Chicago Rapper Lupe Fiasco Somehow Tops L.A.S.E.R.S.

I’m a fairly big fan of Lupe Fiasco. I think his albums are slick, I think his lyrics are, for the most part, sharp and smart, I like that he’s an equal opportunity attacker when it comes to politics, and I think that he channels his anger into his art more effectively than most. I... Read more »

Ten Reasons Barack Obama's Day Was Worse Than Yours

Ten Reasons Barack Obama's Day Was Worse Than Yours
Being President has it’s benefits. Free breakfasts, cheap cell phone service, helicopter rides. Most days, I imagine, when the Muslim population of the Middle East isn’t attempting to nuke itself into a plate of green glass, the economy shows signs of temporary recovery and there are Freedom Fries on the cafeteria menu, it actually seems... Read more »

Bring Your Popcorn: Bachmann's In For A Debate

Remember that moment in the movie Scanners right before the dude’s head explodes, where he totally knows he’s about to die but he’s kind of enjoying it? I’m practicing that face for next week’s Republican Primary Debates in New Hampshire because, as of today, Michele Bachmann, who is not running for President but is running... Read more »

"Weiner's Wiener" Is Actually Weiner's Wiener.

If that isn’t an SEO optimized headline, I just don’t know what is anymore. After a week of playing the media like a fiddle until they bowed to his every explanation no matter how ridiculous, and following the unintentionally hilarious revelation that, not only had he Tweeted his wiener to unsuspecting fans, but his entire... Read more »

Rod Blagojevich Just Wanted to Hunt Bin Laden

In the off chance you were looking for an explanation as to why Rod Blagojevich orchestrated a months-long expedition to determine the cost of appointing himself to Barack Obama’s Senate seat, well, it’s only because he wanted to serve his country by traveling to Afghanistan and hunting down Osama bin Laden. Rod Blagojevich tells jurors... Read more »

John Edwards Gets Indicted

Since Anthony Weiner is basically cock-blocking all news that isn’t Sarah Palin related, this has sort of escaped everyone’s radar. But John Edwards is finally catching the boomerang end of the Karmic loop. Former senator and 2008 presidential candidate John Edwards has been indicted, CNN has learned. A grand jury has been investigating the allegation... Read more »

Palin/Trump 2012?

He’s got the hair, she’s got the shoes. They both have reliable methods of transportation, a history of blatant attention whoring, reality television shows, limited success in positions of power and questionable educational backgrounds. So why shouldn’t Sarah Palin and Donald Trump run on an independent ticket together? The answer escapes Sarah Palin! Sarah Palin,... Read more »

Miley Cyrus Discovers Irony of Urban Outfitters, Hates Rick Santorum

Rick Santorum is something else. He once tried to outlaw the National Weather Service (not an entirely disagreeable position considering AccuWeather provides the same service without sucking up taxpayer funds), quoted Lord of the Rings in a speech about the Iraq War, has seen his name become Latin for “Asshole” and slang for a sexual... Read more »

Rep. Weiner Tweets Wiener, Goes Meta?

Up until Friday, Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY) was best known for three things: (1) being a vocal advocate for his issues in Congress, including but not limited to health care, (2) once racking up nearly two thousand dollars in parking tickets in Washington, DC and (3) being attacked by a goat on live television. After... Read more »

Mitt Romney is Team Jacob

The best part of a Presidential primary is watching the candidates, who for all intents and purposes are absolutely inhuman, struggle to relate to the common folk using what limited knowledge they have of popular culture. Sometimes, this involves twenty-year-old references to the early days of “hip-hop.” Sometimes they managed to squeak in some Internet-gleaned... Read more »