Category: Family

What Lin Manuel Miranda, Listen to Your Mother, and my trans son have in common

What Lin Manuel Miranda, Listen to Your Mother, and my trans son have in common
Lin Manuel Miranda, Listen to Your Mother, and my trans son have absolutely nothing in common. Yet all three were in my dream last night, for a very good reason. In my dream, I was sitting in a balcony of our church, while my son and some of his friends played. Below us, on the... Read more »

I forget my son is transgender

I forget my son is transgender
I have a confession to make: I forget my son is trans. I remember once, about three years ago, talking on the phone to a grandmother from Washington. Her grandson was trans and her job was to vet prospective members for a discussion board. She was the first person I had spoken to about my... Read more »

I am not the greatest mom in the world

I am not the greatest mom in the world
I am not the greatest mom in the world. I’m not seeking validation, I assure you. This is a statement of fact. Most moms would love to hear that phrase, and some moms deserve it. I hear it a lot. And I do not deserve it. At least, not for the reasons I’m hearing it.... Read more »
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My trans son is a real boy

My trans son is a real boy
The Blue Fairy waved her magic wand today and turned my child into a real live boy. At least, that’s a little bit how it felt, opening our passports. The federal government legally recognized my son as a boy. We danced for ten minutes in the middle of the kitchen. He checked again and again,... Read more »

How I told my friends I was trans: a graphic novel by Jake Valentine

I am born and the doctor says, "It's a girl!"
Today is my trans son’s second anniversary. Two years since his rather incredible and surprising transition story, where he publicly and socially transitioned to he/him pronouns and a name that suited his gender identity. For his anniversary gift this year, I’ve decided to let him tell his own story. In graphic novel. Okay, really more of... Read more »

6 steps to help your trans child during a Trump Administration

6 steps to help your trans child during a Trump Administration
It’s been a rough week for all of us and many of us are wondering, what now? What next? What do I need to do? Following are six steps that you can take, today, to help your trans child during a Trump Administration. Don’t Panic Panicking helps no one, and least of all your child. As emergency... Read more »
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The seven stages of grief for the future of America

The seven stages of grief for the future of America
Shock I turned CNN off around 11 PM on Tuesday, November 8th. I couldn’t handle it anymore. It made my head hurt. “Do you want to go to bed?” my husband asked. No. I couldn’t sleep. I felt numb. I felt punched in the gut. I felt like all the air had been sucked out... Read more »

Our new wedding canvas is a tribute to my trans son

Our new wedding canvas is a tribute to my trans son
About a year and a half ago, I stood in front of several hundred people and shared the story of my son. My trans son. That story began with meeting my husband, our unexpected pregnancy, and our marriage. On our wedding day, my son was a month shy of two years old. He had little... Read more »

An open letter to Pope Francis on religion, gender, choice and consequence

An open letter to Pope Francis on religion, gender, choice and consequence
Dear Pope Francis, I’m writing on behalf of my son, and perhaps trans and gender non-conforming children everywhere, in expressing my gratitude for your recent remarks about how we shouldn’t force children into gender roles. I know that’s not what you really said, but I’m choosing to give you the benefit of the doubt. Let... Read more »
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My son's wedding dress

My son's wedding dress
I saw the dress my son wore on my wedding day, on the prettiest little girl with long curly brown hair, not much younger than he is now. That could have been him. I don’t think about it, not when I’m awake. Not when I’m in control and things are good and we’re happy and... Read more »