The Sun Sign Person Formerly Known As

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Finally. Someone has come along to explain the mayhem in my life.The New Zodiac  And to think all this time I thought I was a Cancer married to an
Aquarius with two Capricorn and one Sagittarian child. Now, I can see
the root of the problem. I’m really a Gemini married to a Capricorn with
three Sagittarian children. No wonder my life is crazy! I’m an air sign
living with three fire sign children. It goes a long way toward
explaining why, on some days, I feel like I’m being eaten alive.

The first crushing blow in all this came when I learned I wasn’t a
Cancer. And I know a lot of people out there must have felt the same
way. We should start a support group, but we’ll have to get creative
with the name. Maybe we can call ourselves “The Sun sign people formerly
known as Cancer2.jpg because I think any title with “Former Cancer” in it sounds
a little moribund.

I don’t know how much weight you put into Astrology, but just about everyone knows their sign. It’s a part of who you are. Years ago when I first read the description of the Cancer personality, I felt like I should send them my picture to put next to the description in the book. Same with my husband and the kids and their respective, albeit former, signs. Of course it feels like the earth has tilted off its axis–because it has. And just imagine being labeled an Ophiuchus! I wouldn’t even know how to say it. What a shock this all is.  I mean, if you can’t believe in Astrology, what’s left to believe in?

Okay, self disclosure. I actually think there might be something to it. Not the horoscopes you read in the paper, although I enjoy reading my husband’s, which is always funny in an ironic way. For instance, when I’m trying to talk him into buying something, a new car, say, his horoscope will inevitably read, “Don’t get talked into making any large purchases, like a new car, say.”

I did once have a reading from a “certified” astrologer a while back and it was right on target. Scarily so. I tried to interview her for this, but she hasn’t gotten back to me yet. I imagine she’s busy. (and I thought MY world got upended) She knew only the date, time and place of my birth and yet she told me about my careers (yes, both of them), all about my personality traits, about upcoming travel delays and even a construction project we were thinking about for our house.  She talked fancy, using terms like “Chiron,” “Progressed Moon” and “Mercury sextile radix Venus,” and then told me the lower back pain I would feel in December would benefit from hot oil wraps. She even gave me dates to play the lottery. And we won. Twice. But even with that extra five dollars, I still didn’t feel very comfortable retiring.

I believe there is a lot more to our world than what we can see with our own eyes and over the centuries humans have turned to all sorts of things to explain life, the Universe and everything. I don’t see why Astrology couldn’t prove to be one of them. In the meantime, this new Gemini at least has an explanation as to why it feels like her hair is on fire every day.

And now, I think I will go douse it with my tea, so I can read the leaves.

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