Barring being the subject of a really bizarre and torturous family ritual, everyone loves their birthday. I know I do. It's about the only night of the year where I can pick everything I do, drink the beer I want, and not have to drive myself home. Every other night it's running errands, crappy U.S. Cellular beer selection, and ssssooooobbbbbeeerring up. And that's why it grinds my gears that Freddy Garcia of all people, is granted the privilege of celebrating three different birthdays.
He's listed as being born on October 6, 1976 on chicagowhitesox.com (making him 33), June 10, 1976 on cbssports.com (making him 34), June 10, 1975 (making him 35) on baseballreference.com, and The 18th Day of Berry-Picking Season, Circa 7000 BCE (making him 9,000) on FakeSourceIMadeUp.com. First he gets to pitch in the major leagues without a fastball, and now he get this.
The old adage for dealing with players from foreign countries with
multiple birthdays is to believe the oldest one, especially if that
player is doing such old fogie things as suffering massive drops in
velocity, missing starts due to back pain, sweating out the Pacific
Ocean by the time the 4th inning rolls around, and wearing his uniform
like he's from the 1920's. But if the White Sox and the most official
source of them all, Wikipedia, have him as 33, that seems tempting to
Perhaps, we should just ask Freddy, whose incentive to be truthful now that he'll be searching for a new contract coming off an injury and a year of mixed effectiveness, is at absolute zero. We shouldn't think of Freddy as a con-artist, but again as a crafty veteran, filled with knowledge and resolve. A man who has so much to teach young pitchers and fans about how to navigate the league, and about how pitching is a skill and an art.
Plus he can tell us what killed all the dinosaurs.