Holy Twitter Batman!

Holy Twitter Batman!

My Dr. Seuss take on the beast known as Twitter.

 

Back in the day when this boomer arrived,

We didn't need social media to survive.

But now in this century technology abounds

and along with it social media was found.

First it was Myspace then Zuckerberg's Book,

What a leap into social media that took.

But now we have this monster called Twitter

and it's leaving me feeling ever so bitter.

When it first reared it's head I thought "Geez, what the fuck?"

Another thing to learn and oh did I suck.

So I took a good lesson and started to tweet,

I collected 10 followers and oh it was sweet!

But soon I felt foolish as no more chose to follow

And I found myself sad and feeling quite hollow.

I wonder the point of this silly thing Twitter,

If it were up to me I'd toss it in the shitter.

It's just another tool to take up more time,

And to build up our ego's as followers climb.

When my followers fell yesterday down by 5,

From 25 to 20 I thought I'm barely alive!

I wondered what the heck have I been doing wrong?

Am I boring as shit? Are my tweets just too long?

Perhaps it's just that I'm not tweeting enough,

But to always be clever, Gosh darn-it that's rough.

So I guess I'll just never have followers many,

Like Kardashians, Kutcher and @anistonjenny.

I'll just shut down my tweetdeck, my app and my phone,

Although that may leave me to feel too alone.

So I ask you as I am not really a quitter,

Would you, oh could you please follow me on twitter?

 

PS. You don't have to really.....

 

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