Archive for August 2011

Humor Vault Headlines

78% of sports fans think sports polls are just made up Rookie outfielder hears about upcoming road trip, excitedly packs up car with snacks and cooler Amid offseason chaos, Al Davis accidentally signs Dan Marino, an alpaca and a ham sandwich to separate free agent deals

Tim Wakefield refuses to stop playing 1970s VHS tapes in clubhouse

Tim Wakefield refuses to stop playing 1970s VHS tapes in clubhouse
From the Wait ’til this Year Humor Vault BOSTON–Boston Red Sox players say they’ve gotten used to 44-year-old Tim Wakefield’s strange phrases (“Anything good in the icebox?”) and drinking habits (“One-and-a-half Ensures ensures you’ll throw a good game!”), but they can’t help but be frustrated by his insistence on playing 1970s VHS tapes in the... Read more »

Keeping Tabs: Tom Gorzelanny

Keeping Tabs: Tom Gorzelanny
Tom Gorzelanny was acquired by the Cubs along with John Grabow in the team’s weak attempt to bolster their roster at the 2009 trade deadline. Grabow was the key piece in the deal, posting a 3.24 ERA down the stretch for the fading Cubs, and Gorzelanny struggled in 13 games including seven starts. Gorzelanny would... Read more »
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Cubs off-day trivia answers: 2003 Cubs

Question 1: Who led the 2003 Cubs in stolen bases? A) Corey Patterson (16) B) Tom Goodwin (19) C) Kenny Lofton (12) D) Mark Grudzielanek (6) Question 2: Which Cub hit two home runs in the Cubs’ 12-3 NLCS Game 2 victory? A) Alex Gonzalez B) Sammy Sosa C) Aramis Ramirez D) Moises Alou Question... Read more »

Cubs off-day trivia: 2003 Cubs

Question 1: Who led the 2003 Cubs in stolen bases? A) Corey Patterson B) Tom Goodwin C) Kenny Lofton D) Mark Grudzielanek Question 2: Which Cub hit two home runs in the Cubs’ 12-3 NLCS Game 2 victory? A) Alex Gonzalez B) Sammy Sosa C) Aramis Ramirez D) Moises Alou Question 3: Who was the... Read more »

Philadelphia Eagles declared Super Bowl champions after preseason victory

Philadelphia Eagles declared Super Bowl champions after preseason victory
From the Wait ’til this Year Humor Vault NEW YORK–NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell declared the Philadelphia Eagles winners of Super Bowl XLVI after their solid 28-7 preseason victory over the Carolina Panthers Saturday. While the move surprised some fans, most were prepared for it given all the crazy ass talent the Eagles signed after the... Read more »
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Cubs Week 18 Awards: Another good week, but Zambrano weak

Cubs Week 18 Awards: Another good week, but Zambrano weak
It’s official: the Cubs are firmly in the midst of an extended stretch of good baseball. While they slowed down a bit after their seven-game winning streak, they still managed to take two of three from the Nationals and followed that up with two of three from the Braves, including two in a row after... Read more »

Bears making interesting gambles before preseason even begins

There’s been no shortage of news in the NFL since the lockout ended, and there’s been no shortage of headlines coming out of Bears camp either. First the Bears made waves by opting not to re-sign veteran center Olin Kreutz, who recently signed with New Orleans. The offensive line was brutally awful last year, so... Read more »

Cubs Week 17 Awards: Best. Week. Ever.

Cubs Week 17 Awards: Best. Week. Ever.
It wasn’t really the best week ever, in the grand scheme of things. But as miserable as this season has been, a 6-1 week sure feels like the best week ever. Sort of like in the show Best Week Ever when someone like Andy Dick would win just because he didn’t expose his genitals or... Read more »
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Say, what's that Casey Coleman guy up to?

The Cubs refuse to give Casey Coleman a consistent shot here in this lost season (they trotted out 35-year-old Rodrigo Lopez again yesterday, curious to see if he could avoid sucking ass. He could not.), and I can’t help but wonder how he’s doing out there in Iowa. Let’s find out: After his most recent... Read more »