Strengths and Weaknesses: Dirk Nowitzki

From the Wait 'til this Year Humor Vault


Dirk-Nowitzki.jpg

Mavericks forward Dirk Nowitzki is a 10-time NBA All-Star and was named the league's MVP in 2007. He's helped his team to a great playoff run this year as he searches for his first title. Let's take a look at his strengths and weaknesses (yes, I borrowed this concept from The Onion):

STRENGTHS

  • Takes "Maverick" title very seriously, rarely conforms
  • Height allows him to trash talk with regard to opponents' unique head features, bald spots
  • One of the best in NBA history at keeping shirt tucked in during games
  • Despite nearly 900 career steals, has not been arrested once
  • Named "Dirk"
WEAKNESSES

  • Really needs to work on his half-court shot
  • Pretty sure I saw him miss a free throw in the last playoff series
  • Even in his love life, always seems to be looking for a rebound
  • Almost never pulls off a triple axel after shooting a jump shot
  • Has thus far failed to obtain a patent for his patented fadeaway

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Tags: Dirk Nowitzki, humor vault

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  • Strength: Didn't die when he opened his mouth like what's-his-name.

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