Father's Day Doesn't Get Any Easier

Father's Day Doesn't Get Any Easier

This is my fourth Father’s day without my old man and like him Father’s Day isn’t a big deal to me.

My wife gives me plenty of time with our son and I soak it up, I’m just doing my job as a dad and being with my kid.

But I miss my old man like crazy, yes he was cantankerous, would tell you on the phone “I’m tired of talking” and end the conversation.

But some days he’d drop advice and knowledge on you that would make your head spin. Or better yet, get you out of a tough situation.

I can’t tell you how many times in the years he’s been gone I’ve looked up to the sky and wondered what he’d do.

I’ve also looked through my sunroof in my SUV and said thanks to him too for situations he’s prepared me for.

We used to talk on the phone every Sunday afternoon once he moved downstate, for the years I‘ve been married I looked forward to our conversations, again my wife gave me that time and space.

In the good weather, I’d talk to him while we both were outside grilling and we’d compare notes on BBQ and watch the NASCAR race and talk about other car stuff.

We didn’t have life altering dialogue, a lot of bad jokes (that I can’t repeat here), we spoke more like old friends than father and son.

It was so relaxing to speak with him in those last years, he wasn’t judgmental but gave such good advice.

He “kept it real”, long before someone came up with that term.

I thought as the years went by this might get easier after he was gone.

It doesn’t.

My son is now two years old, never met the old man but embodies him so much its scary.

In some ways its like having my old man back to see his mannerisms, in other ways to see my son look at me with my dad’s face makes me miss him even more.

I see other guys my age with their dad’s and I’m not jealous, I just hope they honor their Pops and enjoy the time they have with him.

I did.

The other day my wife was watching the movie Titanic from 20 years ago, I told her how my dad and I saw that in the show when it came out.

Yeah he was my date that afternoon.

He told everyone he knew after that, (including people coming into the show after us), “Hey at the end of the movie the boat sinks”, I’m still laughing at that.

That’s what I remember of him, the lighter stuff, bad jokes, insults to people.

The other day in my Facebook feed the attached picture popped up from 5-6 years ago, I had forgotten about that and got emotional, that's how strong this is.

I have no regrets when it comes to the old man, I sacrificed a lot of time to drive downstate to be with him and make those Sunday afternoon calls.

It was good times, a lot of laughs, some great BBQ from both of us and enough advice and a great legacy to last the lifetime of myself and my son.

Still miss the old man though.

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    Charles W. Johnson

    I'm a lifelong writer (since I was 8 years old), and have been doing this blog in some form or fashion since 2004. I'm a DePaul University alum, class of 1999 and prior to that Brother Rice class of 1994. . And I appreciate you taking to the time to read what I have to say, feel free to email charles.w.johnson@hotmail.com

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