Bartender, make that a double.
The only good to come out of this presidential election year is the brisk sale of Halloween masks, fodder for Late Night talk show hosts and Alec Baldwin's performance on "Saturday Night Live."
Wait, did I just say "election year?"
It has seemed more like an election decade.
A year of bullying, interrupting, screaming, sniffling, coughing, the nerve of that baby crying and hatred. I feel like I've been slimed and need a hot shower. Just when you think, it can't get any worse, it does.
Dirty politics at its most shameful.
Our candidates misbehave like two toddlers fighting in the check-out line at Target because mom won't buy them Play-doh.
In forty years of voting, I've never heard the words "sexual assault allegations" used in a sentence with the name of a candidate running for our highest office of government. My head's about to explode.
I'm actually quite surprised a fistfight hasn't broken out on stage during the debates. Either with each other or the debate monitors. Of course with the third debate coming up, it could still happen.
Make America Great Again.
Wait a minute, I thought America was already pretty great. Of course we have our problems, how can you not with over 325,000,000 people all living under one roof. The way to solve problems is to roll up your sleeves and get to the hard work and sacrifice it takes, guided by leadership that motivates and inspires greatness. How do you plan on doing that? Answer the question with concrete examples, not rhetoric or insults.
Over a million people have died to defend our country so we have the privilege to wave the red, white and blue with pride and dignity. Now we've come to this. Are these candidates a reflection of what the American people are all about? God, I hope not.
Head shaking. Finger pointing. Eye rolling.
After this debacle, will Congress and the Senate ever be able to work with our new President to forge ahead and unite these United States? I doubt it.
Now we have a country divided, torn, feeling frustrated, bickering and more fed up than ever.
The Grand Old Party is a mess and leadership won't even endorse their own candidate. Backstabbing, threats and contempt are mounting daily.
People have actually lost friendships over this election because of their alliance to a candidate.
Many voters have vowed to stay away on election day. Neither candidate inspires them to put their powerful, black mark on the ballot. Please reconsider that option. If not, then no complaining after the inauguration in January. If you still can't bear to vote for president, then at least vote for your candidates for congress, senate, local and state governments.
There is an elephant in the room, and the stench is foul.
More Tic Tacs, please.