Thank you all for your feedback and support from Multiple Sclerosis and MRIs: When does it become normal? Your response showed me that you do want to read about my journey and there are others out there that my words can help.
The MRI was not fun, the Xanax did not work and instead I practiced my yoga breathing with my eyes closed for an hour and half as I stayed as still as possible.
This week I visited my smart and gentle MS doctor to learn the results of the MRI plus additional updates on my health. He studied the photos of my MRIs from September 2012 and August 2013 and revealed my brain and neck lesions are smaller and less intense. There is one new lesion, but my doctor was not concerned as its size was about 5 millimeters and he believes it was a result of the time before I began Gilenya.
My doctor tested my reflexes, balance and coordination and said I passed with flying colors, yet the pessimist in me only noticed that I am much less centered and strong as I was pre-diagnosis.
There was a general vibe of "wow, you are doing great" from the nurse and doctor. When the nurse called me back to get my vitals she claimed, "It is so nice to have someone young and healthy in here."
As she said that I was thinking, "I'm not young or healthy."
The thing is that at the wheelchair and scooter filled office, I am young and healthy. It is hard not to watch the husband pushing his wives' wheelchair and wonder if that will be us.
Also, it is weird to look at pictures of my own brain.
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