It is true. It has been decided that my husband and I are not having any more babies.
It is a hard concept for me to grasp as I look through the neatly folded onesies each chronicling a different memory of the quick journey to get to today. Isn't it ironic that moms of infants struggle to get through the days, yet looking back I miss those moments?
Before I continue my sob story, I should let it be known that I am beyond blessed. I have two children that are healthy, vibrant and more than I could ask for.
Honestly, I feel ridiculous complaining when so many women struggle with infertility and have no children. I wish there was a way I could help each of those ladies, some suffering in silence.
Whether it is valid or not, I'm experiencing some real emotions and trying to look at the good in this situation. Here is what I have come up with so far.
1. No more diapers.
2. No more naps.
3. No more strollers.
With this new stage it allows our family of four to travel and explore our city. Our offspring are now old enough to question, help and experience the world with us and I'm trying to embrace this next phase.
Despite all this positive thinking, I cannot imagine I will ever see an innocent, squeezable baby again without my heart falling out my body and yearning to have one of my own.
Does this ever go away?
I'm a planner and this past year of limbo has been difficult. I'm hoping this decision will end the constant wonder.
To really put closure to this new life decision, I am giving away every single item of girl and boy baby clothing that I have saved in labeled containers by size. Plus high chairs, car seats, toys, books, mattresses and guitars.
If you need anything baby/toddler related come to our garage sale in Roscoe Village this Saturday. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org for more information about the sale.
Another cherry on top; partial proceeds will be donated to Donna's Good Things. In preparing for this sale, I've had many discussions with my children about giving their belongings to others who need them. We talked about what we would do with our earnings and when I told my family about Donna, the decision was easily made.
My goal is to feel lighter and ready to move forward after this weekend.
Did you know when your family was complete? Was it a hard decision? Did you find peace?