I thought I'd been 'Punk'd."
When I read the news reports of 35-year-old Christopher Ashton Kutcher delivering heartfelt, wise advice to an audience of teen-somethings and twentysomethings including Lindsey Lohan in-waiting Miley Cyrus and Demi Lovato, it was surprising news for the Iowa-born hunk who's made his career modeling, starring as the airhead from "That 70's Show" and 'Two and a Half Men" and dating/marrying beautiful women (Demi Moore, Mila Kunis, anyone?) it was a surprise.
After all, he'd build his career on being a "mimbo" (man/bimbo). No other presentation had prepared us for this.
And yet, what he said was so right, it was scary:
"The sexiest thing in the entire world is being really smart. And being thoughtful. And being generous. Everything else is crap! … It's just crap people try to sell to you to make you feel less."
Ashton Kutcher, accepting his Ultimate Choice Award from the Teen Choice Awards
Now THAT's the sexiest thing I've EVER heard.
And the rest IS crap.
If I bought into the standard version of beauty, I would be an insecure mess. I have never been a traditionally endowed beauty. I have never fit the cover-girl mode. I am a healthy girl. Not model-skinny. Curvy, I like to say.
But if I can't accept and love myself, I can't love anyone else either. So I avoid the typecasting of the model-skinny, and accept that I like my own looks as they are. I have a personality. And some intelligence. I've been called 'hot' more than once in my lifetime, by people I like and respect, and by perfect strangers.
Most of all, I am fortunate to have a partner who truly appreciates my version of 'sexy.'
And by Kutcher's standards, he's pretty sexy, too.
Chris Kutcher and I might get along just fine, if we ever meet face to face. If he means what he says, we have a lot in common. Work ethic and philosophies of beauty. He'd also like my mother. She chose my father, not just because he was a good-looking man, but because was smart. And because he respected her intelligence. Dad said that made him a wise man. And a hot hunk, in my mother's eyes.
They were married for 56 1/2 years, until his recent death.
Intelligence is sexy. So is confidence in oneself. That should be the new rule.
Not only did Kutcher redefine sexy for legions of fans, he also dispersed some sage advice for 'Generation Me:'
According to US Weekly, he advised the largely-teen audience about three things he'd learned growing up and getting into the industry -- first, that "opportunity looks a lot like work," second, that the "sexiest thing in the entire world is being really smart," and third, to "build a life," not to live one.
He has certainly lived up to the work ethic, having gone from playing Michael Kelso in the Fox sitcom That '70s Show to creating, producing and hosting Punk'd, and playing lead roles in the Hollywood films Dude, Where's My Car?, Just Married, The Butterfly Effect, The Guardian, and What Happens in Vegas.
"I've never had a job in my life that I was better than," Kutcher said. "I was always lucky just to have a job. And every job I had was a stepping stone I had to my next job and I never quit my job until I had my next job."
He seems to have come by his wisdom honestly and with mistakes along the way. According to several online biographies and news reports, during his senior year, he broke into his high school at midnight with his cousin in an attempt to steal money; he was arrested leaving the scene. Kutcher was convicted of third-degree burglary and sentenced to three years 'probation and 180 hours of community service.
That ran counter to his dreams to major in biochemical engineering, which he eventually did at the University of Iowa. That dashed a dream of his....to help find a cure for his brother's heart ailment and his twin brother's cerebral palsy.
Kutcher, stated that although the experience "straightened him out", he lost his girlfriend and anticipated college scholarships, and he was ostracized at school and in his community.
Part of growing up is accepting responsibility. Kutcher learned from the errors of his ways, and moved forward.
Not everyone is so lucky.
As I'm completing this, word just came from MSN Entertainment that model and reality TV star Gia Allemand of "The Bachelor" and "Bachelor Pad" died of an apparent suicide. She was 29. According to the statement, Allemand's boyfriend, NBA player Ryan Anderson, found her Monday night in her New Orleans home after an apparent suicide attempt. "Due to a critical loss of brain and organ function, life support was withdrawn today," the statement said. "Ms. Allemand passed away peacefully with her mother, boyfriend, and other life-long friends by her side. ..."
How tragic. What she could have given the world is forever taken away. Why? We don't know yet.
Christopher Ashton Kutcher, now the second-sexiest man alive for me, summed it up well at the Ultimate Choice "Old Guy" award ceremony:
" So build a life, don't live one, find your opportunities and always be sexy."
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