Why Set Ups Always Go Wrong when you're a Redhead

Why Set Ups Always Go Wrong when you're a Redhead
I didn't know redheaded couples could be so cute.

Every time a friend has ever tried to set me up with someone, it's gone wrong. Every set up attempt has followed a specific pattern, and I am 90 percent sure of the primary reason for failure: they always try to set me up with a redhead.

There are 3 types of people available for gingers to date: ginger philes, redheads and the color-blind. I prefer ginger philes, against my better judgment, as ginger men creep me out. Seriously, it's unnatural for people to have a primary color sprouting out of their heads. On men, it's always more flamey than women, it seems.

Secondly, the men my friends try to set me up with are always skinny. Now I know a lot of women who are attracted to spindly men, and I am very happy for them. And lucky for them, skinny men will likely not blow up in their '30s and '40s like most men. However, I am not one of these women; I like a man with a bit of meat on him.

Girls always seem to make the mistake of thinking I want someone who looks and acts somewhat like myself: short, thin and ginger, and a little on the quieter side ...like me. Little do they realize how much I disgust myself with my creepy lack of melanin and disappearing-into-my-face clear eyebrows and the way black mascara looks too harsh on me. As much as ginger procreation is on my agenda, I want someone complementary -- not my mirror image. I wish girls would ask what you're interested in before trying to set you up.

And I wish people would stop trying to set redheads up. It's like some weird form of incest or something.

However, the couple in the picture on this post is tres cute.

Have you ever been set up before? How did it work out for you?


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  • fb_avatar

    Youve put way too much thought into a meaningless rant. Maybe thats why you dont have a date.

  • In reply to Carla McPhee:

    Hm, food for thought. But I'm actually pretty sure it's because I don't have a soul or visible eyebrows. And because my personality sucks.

  • fb_avatar

    Incomprehensible, creepy babble. The only upside that I could gather is your promise not to date for a year. I am assuming you will make good use of this time in psychotherapy.

  • In reply to Deke Rivers:

    Already tried that. The shrink told me he was afraid of redheads. So this time around, it looks like I'll be watching I Love Lucy reruns and drowning my sorrows in ginger beer instead.

  • Are you serious? I am a redheaded woman (a gorgeous, pale skinned one at that) and this is incredibly offensive. Maybe you can't get a date because you're a superficial twit.

  • In reply to racdavis:

    That's very likely.

  • The guy I dated in high school and a few years after was 6'4, broad-shouldered had tons of charm and had gorgeous, thick red hair. It only took me 5 years to realize he was an abusive alcoholic; I ended up getting an order or protection against him. Now he's some other woman's problem and their kids are homely.

  • In reply to GabbyEsp:

    I am really, really sorry to hear that and really, really glad you got out of that relationship and can see him for what he is. Thanks for posting this.

  • fb_avatar

    Well I followed the link from The Chicago Northwestern out of curiosity since I am a single red head (male) and I would agree with other commenters - you are a twit. Honestly I would love to meet a red headed woman especially with freckles (a fav). t I imagine you to look like cartman given the unattractive icon you have selected and your dumb comments. But hair color should not be your deciding factor, its beyond the color of the skin or hair which makes a person desirable. Red heads are a rare and disappearing breed and you certainly are contributing with your ignorance. What is the point of your post anyway, to demonstrate your ignorance or to inflame the flamed ones of which you should be excluded?

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    The Ginger Phile has had the unfortunate disposition of being a ginger since birth. She has tried various medications to cure her gingervitis, including therapies such as tantrum-throwing. Her efforts have been to no avail. Instead, she is trying to write it out, via this blog. Unfortunately, she doesn't think it will bear a soul for her. The Ginger Phile is from the exotic land of Wisconsin, where she had daily inner turmoil over whether she was a ginger or a daywalker. So far, three of three votes say daywalker. She begs to differ, as someone recently told her they would want to be with her if they were biking at night because she is so pale.

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