New Year's Resolutions for Redheads

New Year's Resolutions for Redheads

I know a lot of you are thinking about your New Year's resolutions: things like losing weight, quitting smoking and getting out of debt. I have news for you: 99 percent of you will fail. Do not set yourself up for failure. Instead, use my guide to discover a more appropriate resolution and create a better you in 2012.

If you're a ginger, consider resolving to:

  1. Stop counting your freckles.
  2. Pretend to love your hair until you really do love it.
  3. Not wear orange, pink or certain shades of red.
  4. Learn to identify ginger philes immediately and avoid them at all costs.
  5. Support redheaded procreation and vow to consumate "love" only with those who have a very high chance of hidden recessive redheaded genes. (Primarily blondes and other redheads).
  6. Stop wearing garish black mascara.
  7. Pick out a really, really awesome redhead themed Halloween costume.
  8. Attend Redhead Day in the Netherlands.
  9. Shun daywalkers.
  10. Read, comment on and use as a source of inspiration, The Ginger Philes. Also, follow The Ginger Philes on Twitter & hope that your soullessness will save you from the Apocalypse.

Sorry for the shameless self-promotion but my goal is to really give this blog a-go. Watch out tomorrow for resolution suggestions for ginger philes. Can you think of any?

Leave a comment

  • Advertisement:
  • Advertisement:
  • ChicagoNow is full of win

    Welcome to ChicagoNow.

    Meet our bloggers,
    post comments, or
    pitch your blog idea.

  • Meet The Blogger

    thegingerphiles

    The Ginger Phile has had the unfortunate disposition of being a ginger since birth. She has tried various medications to cure her gingervitis, including therapies such as tantrum-throwing. Her efforts have been to no avail. Instead, she is trying to write it out, via this blog. Unfortunately, she doesn't think it will bear a soul for her. The Ginger Phile is from the exotic land of Wisconsin, where she had daily inner turmoil over whether she was a ginger or a daywalker. So far, three of three votes say daywalker. She begs to differ, as someone recently told her they would want to be with her if they were biking at night because she is so pale.

  • Recent Comments

  • Tags

  • Monthly Archives

  • Advertisement: