We all knew the old fairy tales had a dark side to them, but as kids and parents of kids we focused on the bright side. Now -- in our ever darkening culture -- Hollywood is exploiting their dark side. Take for ugly example its latest release: 'Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters.'
I kid you not. In this version Gretel is similar to the CIA agent played by Jessica Chastain in 'Zero Dark Thirty.' As one reviewer puts is: "She's fighting to survive in a world filled with crass, stupid men, and she will track her foes to the end of the Earth." Not only is Gretel a relentless avenger, but there is an anti-male sub-text to the whole plot. Time the girls turned the tables on the guys!
But wait, there's more coming down the slick, slimy studio pipelines. There are plans for "Thumbelina:Troll Tracker.' In this scheduled epic, Thumbelina is on the prowl for the evil trolls who did in her family. The studio producer describes her this way: "Think of our Thumbelina as a cross between Joan of Arc, Lara Croft and Nancy Pelosi. She's short. She's vocal. She has a distinctive fashion sense. And she'll cut you into ribbons."
So much for Hollywood's 20th C girl-next-door flicks featuring Doris Day, Debbie Reynolds, and Sally Fields. Lets put it this way, fellas, you wouldn't want to marry one of these sexy action figures unless you were as handy with a weapon as she is.
The bottom-line question that rushes to one's numbed brain is: Why? For heaven's sake, why this cinematic obsession with all that is dark and malevolent?
But the beat goes on. There are still other possibilities the boys in Tinsel Town are talking about. The Three Little Pigs: Warlock Trackers, 'My Little Pony: Bringer of Darkness....well it's hard to go on. Because if these convoluted story lines are what we can expect from our multiplexes, I'm not sure we shouldn't ban multiplexes right along with guns.
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