If Jesus Really Did Have A Wife, Who Would Hollywood Cast...?

Given the culture for men, it's always possible Jesus did have a wife. Jewish mothers, then and today, are known for wanting their boys to "marry a nice Jewish girl who can give him nice Jewish boys."

Turns out the Gospels never suggest Jesus had any. Perhaps much to Mary's disappointment, he hung out instead with the guys. Oh, there was that mysterious other Mary [Magdalene] but her relationship was always as a follower, not the nice Jewish girl like Peter and some of the others had married.

Then along came Dan Brown...!

He made a gazillion dollars dredging up an old and oft-discredited hint that Magdalene was Jesus' "beloved." Beethoven also had a mysterious "beloved." But it took Dan to crunch those juicy 1st century possibilities into a tantalizing mega-hit book and then movie.

But now, not satisfied they've squeezed out all the juice they can, others have come along with an ancient papyrus text which includes the name "wife." Hmmm? Chances are, though, no movie contract is in the offing. I mean, there's only so much conspiracy juice in any one pile of forbidden fruit.

Granted, institutional religion has run into some speed bumps among today's suave carpe diem skeptics. But this is no conspiracy -- believers still travel those same roads. Only we've found the speed bumps a lot easier to manage with faith in something rather then doubt about everything. Married or not. However, if they actually did decide to cast someone in the part, can just see Cameron Diaz as a nice Jewish girl....

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