Category: Uncategorized

Coming to terms with mortality: 'Keep in touch' has a new meaning

Heads up: This post is about the passing of my grandfather and includes some discussion of hospitals and such.  I last spoke with my grampie on July 21  – just two months ago.  He’d spent a week in Chicago celebrating all types of family and then headed back to his Missouri bachelor pad to recover from... Read more »

Worry about your kids, not Target's bathroom policy

My kid is a wanderer. Most of the time he’s not being insubordinate, just easily distracted. Yesterday, after school, he chased his friends around the perimeter of the lot and I watched as he slipped out onto the sidewalk to keep their pace. We left, and through tears, he promised he “would work on it”.... Read more »

Take a free tour of Santa's suite at Swissôtel Chicago this holiday season!

Views from the suite span from the Chicago river to Lake Michigan. It's splendid.
Sharpen your elbows and do some burpees because it’s Santa hunting season!  Or you could just hang out in the Swissôtel Chicago’s luxurious Presidential-turned Santa Suite, sip some complimentary hot chocolate from their fancypants cocoa bar and high-five the fat man. Starting today through Christmas Eve, you’re invited to take a tour of Santa’s digs located... Read more »

Unique gifts for the '80s movie lover on your list - 2015 edition

It’s holiday shopping time again, y’all. And, as usual, I’m inspired by the Internet and all of the goodies on which I can waste spend cash. Go American consumerism! Clueless turned 30 this year. 3-0. Sweet Lord. Aside from that creepy step-sibling incest sub-plot, the movie is solid. Bring it back with a sweet dazzle feather... Read more »

4 "must watch" documentaries for this fall

The season of insomnia is upon us – daylight savings time + holiday shopping stress + bills are what gets me amped up. That and the fact that my mom has no concept of time when it comes to late night/early morning calls to tell me she is out of make-up. What to do to... Read more »

The first three weeks of Kindergarten: What fresh Hell is this?

You know when you (or your partner) is pregnant and everyone asks you about your birth plan? Someone inevitably follows up with, “women have been doing it for thousands of years,” as a (usually well-intentioned) reminder that you pushing that giant watermelon of a fetus out of your body isn’t totally bananas. The thing is,... Read more »

There's A New Spin On #likeagirl And I LOVE IT

I recently saw Always’ new #LikeAGirl “Unstoppable” PSA and, whatever their motivation, found it extremely compelling. It reminded me that I always need to question how I communicate with kids. Yes, I generally suffer from an untreatable case of “foot in mouth disease”, but I do try to maintain a reasonable level of self-awareness when... Read more »

8 reasons why my husband may never let me plan another vacation

Well, we made it back from our Balkans road trip with a bag of souvenirs and a case of campylobacter. If you aren’t familiar with the latter, consider yourself lucky. However, this got me thinking that maybe, just maybe, I shouldn’t be in charge of planning our vacations. Why?  I’ll give you eight reasons. 1. I... Read more »

Remembering Mom: A Cooperative Project

Last week someone asked me to describe my mom before she got sick. However, try as I might, I only have a handful of memories of her before everything went to Hell in a handbasket. Of course, this isn’t some sort of pity party. Well, maybe it is a little…but mostly for her. Honestly, I... Read more »

8 reasons why I am going to lose my sh!t today

Let’s just jump in, shall we? 1. My mom lost her dental plate. Again. Nerds Smartypants of the world, can you PLEASE, for the love of sweet baby Jesus, invent a bluetooth or homing device for dentures/plates/whathaveyou? These things cost more than the valued place on a Duggar’s v-card. 2. The battery backup for our... Read more »
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    Annie Swingen

    Chicago-based hyperbole enthusiast. Mom to a kid and sometimes my mom. Overboard (1987) obsessed weirdo. I like the funnies in life.

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