Archive for January 2014

Are you going to bring me my lemon or do I have to squeeze it from my hat?: My Love Affair with Overboard

I used to work in a video store. It was the best job on the face of the planet. Seriously.  I got to act like a hero and zero out late fees, I miraculously found a size “small” t-shirt which is every teen girl’s dream, and we watched movies non-stop. While at Video Station, I... Read more »
By Annie Swingen,
January 29, 2014 at 10:02 pm • 

Cold Weather Survival Tips From One Jackass to Another

Unless you have been watching nothing but Queen Bey’s Grammy performance on repeat, you probably have heard that the Arctic Vortex or whatever they are calling it is back and almost as nasty as Bey. If you aren’t used to this weather, or are a little flaky like yours truly, here are some cold weather... Read more »
By Annie Swingen,
January 28, 2014 at 9:29 am • 

Caretaking Chronicles: A Hospital Trip for My Mom aka They Should Block Cell Phone Signals in Hospitals

Sweet mother of pearl have I been delinquent in writing ChicagoNow posts. My excuse? Ho-Ho is in the hospital.  Worry not, she is fine. In fact she is, dare I say, thriving? 24/7 attention? Check. Different people to incur her wrath? Of course! Continual access to not one  but two phone lines on which she... Read more »
By Annie Swingen,
January 23, 2014 at 9:15 pm • 
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Watch These Netflix Gems Now

TLC's Extreme Cheapskates (2013). Bargh! Last weekend I spent way too long banking online so I could watch this show. I love a good deal, but good Lord do these people put me to shame. Eating of strangers plates? Washing clothes by showering in them? It's crazy awesome.
We dropped cable a few years ago because we weren’t watching enough of it to rationalize shelling out $12 million/month AND there is more than enough weird stuff on Netflix to keep us engaged for years.  Here are six documentaries/series I suggest you check out if you haven’t already…or consider yourself dead to me. What... Read more »
By Annie Swingen,
January 11, 2014 at 5:04 pm • 

Thank God Schools are Open Today

Holy hell am I happy to get back to work. As if you didn’t know, Chicago was dubbed “ChiBeria” over the past few days and more importantly schools were closed. Some people stayed in and hibernated, watching Overboard (1987) and eating caviar. Others, like my husband, were slaves to the man and dug out to... Read more »
By Annie Swingen,
January 8, 2014 at 1:22 pm • 

Caretaking Chronicles: Tylenol is more effective than Methadone

Ardie Ho-Ho has been on a terror lately…when I say lately I mean the past 12 months. But seriously, I might soon end up in jail. There was the whole guilt over potential dentures, the time her teeth cracked and fell out and I lost my mind on a street corner, and then when she... Read more »
By Annie Swingen,
January 4, 2014 at 9:39 pm • 
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Parental hoarding: What "keepsakes" are actually worth keeping?

I need some advice. Today, my kid tried to give away a piece of art to his aunt and my best friend, Katie.  It’s a self-portrait signed by the artist himself; the first that even included arms and legs and around 10 toes and fingers.  My reaction?  I didn’t want to share this gem with... Read more »
By Annie Swingen,
January 2, 2014 at 5:42 pm • 
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    Annie Swingen

    Chicago-based hyperbole enthusiast. Mom to a kid and sometimes my mom. Overboard (1987) obsessed weirdo. I like the funnies in life.

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