Stress and Love

Stress and Love
Today is Valentine’s Day. As a single woman, I’ve struggled with how big of a deal to make this day. “Love” is not something that has come, although I think I’ve been open to it (unless someone knows something different and I hope you will tell me). There’s all these messages one receives about what it means to be single on Valentine’s Day. How stressful is that! I know many, many, many fabulous single women and I find myself knowing that the guys they have met are not near being good enough.
Driving to work this morning, I was listening to a radio station that discussed a book written by a woman who basically indicated (from what I heard, now, on the radio) that it’s a woman’s fault for being single because of whatever issues she has. I’m not sure if it was that cut and dry, as I really wasn’t sure what I was hearing (caught more the tail end of this segment), but I know I felt frustrated. I mean, really, a woman bashing on other single women (apparently she was married three times and I’m not sure her current status).
My point is that is that hearing this was a bit stressful. While I admit I’m not perfect (and frankly, don’t ever want to be), I know I’ve got a lot going for me and lot of things to work on. And I don’t think “love” is that black and white. After hearing this bit, I was actually grateful that I have some fantastic friends to hang out with, who are also single, on a day that is about love. And I realized that I love these people and these friendships. That means something.
It wasn’t only realizing this that reduced my stress in the moment. On the same radio show, I caught another bit about those single women who are perfectly content being single (Rock on.) In fact, the radio host called them “unicorns”. Now, I like unicorns, in fact, I love unicorns. There’s something magical, awe-inspiring, and beautiful about these rare creatures. And those are some pretty awesome characteristics to have.
Well, being a unicorn sure beats having a stressful day. Heart on.

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    Dr. Serena Wadhwa

    Serena Wadhwa, Psy.D., LCPC, CADC, received her doctorate in Clinical Psychology from ISPP-Chicago, specializing in health psychology. Dr. Wadhwa is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor, has a Master’s in Counseling and is a Certified Alcohol and Drug Counselor. She is the Director of TriQual Living Center (, providing education and therapy on addiction/recovery and chronic stress, burnout and compassion fatigue. She provides individual therapy at the Alexian Brothers Behavioral Health Hospital Outpatient Group Practice and is an assistant professor/program coordinator at Governors State University, as well as adjunct faculty at a couple community colleges. Dr. Wadhwa works in a variety of roles as a consultant, presenter, trainer, lecturer, author, and contributor to ChicagoNow. She has presented on various topics in the Midwest and published various articles on topics relating to stress, addiction, and health. She also develops activities for a variety of psycho-educational lectures, and has several published. She is also a member of several professional organizations. She has a book on "Stress in the Modern World" coming out in 2014 and several e-books this year. Her latest project is an Internet Radio Show, Moving Forward: Wellness One Step at a Time.

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