I was going to write a blog post "In Defense of Honey Boo Boo" but then, as you will see below, the Boo Boo clan did something completely indefensible.
First, let me just say, I'm prejudiced. Yes, I admit it. When it comes to ridiculous reality television, I have this strong inclination to prejudge.
Before viewing Jersey Shore: Ew! These people! What an embarrassment to me and all Italian Americans from NJ!
After: Um, I love them. What? They're harmless. Lovable buffoons, really.
Before viewing Married to Jonas: Ew! These people! They look so annoying.
After: Um, I love them! How cute are they?!
My mom: And I love her family. All they talk about is food! ... They're like us.
Before viewing Here Comes Honey Boo Boo: Ew! These people! I just can't.
After: Um, subtitles aside; eating cheese puffs off the floor aside; the pet pig aside; the pregnant 17 year old sister aside - They appear to be a happy family who clearly have fun together and seem to love each other. What? Is that a dollar you're holding? Holla!
Ok, whatever you think of Boo Boo and Mama and Sugar Bear (Santa!), even I can't defend one thing. This one thing is so disgusting, so reprehensible, I'm actually experiencing a gag reflex as write this.
Ok, I'll just say it.
Ketchup and butter
And they had the nerve to give it a cute name. "Sketti"
I actually googled it because I was so horrified and was keen to find other blog posts talking about how disgusting this is and how these people need an intervention. What I found was that other people actually do this too. Sketti?! As it turns out, sketti is not only indigenous to the people of McIntyre, Georgia. Other people all around the country and world do it. (Sigh)
So, at this point, I must intervene. To anyone who has ever sunk so low that they actually thought of doing this (let alone eat it) or has done the almost as disgusting though not quite as offensive thing of ... buying sauce in a jar (trying not to gag), please know there is another way! Believe it or not, tomato sauce - real, delicious, tasty tomato sauce (or gravy as we call it but that's a blog post for another day) is actually QUICK and EASY to make! I swear. Here you go -
- 1 TBSP olive oil
- 4 cloves of garlic, chopped
- 1/2 white onion, chopped
- 2 28oz cans of crushed tomatoes (IMPORTANT: These MUST - absolutely must - be San Marzano tomatoes. It will say on the can something along the lines of 'from the San Marzano region.' In the Chicago area, Treasure Island carries them. I don't personally know the San Marzano situation in Georgia but that is still no excuse for sketti.)
- 1 tsp oregano
- 1/4 cup basil
- salt and pepper - small dash of each
1/ Heat the olive oil on medium heat.
2/ Add the garlic. Saute.
3/ Add onions. Saute.
4/ Add tomatoes and rest of ingredients. Stir.
5/ Reduce heat to low. Cover and simmer, stirring occasionally for twenty minutes.
Ok, it's not as fast or cheap as buying a bottle of ketchup but at least it's not a mortal sin! G0d save the sketti boo boos of the world. (Shaking my head)
In the spirit of Roses, today, I am grateful that I may have saved just one person from sketti. (Patting back) A world without sketti is a beautimous one. Beautimous indeed.
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