Graduating from ghetto to GHETTO FABULOUS!

Graduating from ghetto to GHETTO FABULOUS!

As a self-proclaimed “ghetto fab” girl, I feel it is my duty to bestow upon my “not so ghetto” friends a bit of the 411 on the life of a ghetto fab girl. First off, just because I was born in the ghetto doesn't mean I pack a nine with me 24/7. It merely means I graduated with a B.S. from the School of Hard Knocks.

Although me and my crew are trying to get our school the accreditation it SO deserves, at this moment, we've got a lot of paperwork to file and questions to answer from some very important people. We are cautiously optimistic…

Anywho…there is a distinct difference between the life of a ghetto girl and a ghetto fabulous girl. The major distinction between the two is that a GF girl not only graduated from the SHK (mind you, with a PhD), but she has also established her credibility not only in the street but has quite the following with the public (i.e., corporate America, reality shows, etc., etc.).

GF girls can carry the whole package: the perfect career, the designer clothes, the handbags (not bought off the street corners), the flashy cars, and the men. They are respected for not only their street smarts, but also the ability to maneuver through corporate America with the shrewdness of a dominant male and the understanding of a compassionate woman. Looks can be deceiving when you mess with a ghetto fab girl!

At the last meeting you attended, she may have thrown you a little grace, but you screw up twice and you may have to reckon with a verbal assault that your Mama's Mama could never have prepared you for. The worst thing to do when faced with this situation is try to defend yourself. You are better off searching for her 9 and shooting yourself point blank. This will be your only solution if you open your mofo mouth.

Sorry…I digress.  The point is, every GF girl has graduated from ghetto. That’s a prerequisite. No matter how proper and prim you act, just let one slimy contractor (who is working on your master closet at your McMansion) attempt to take advantage of you—and you will go ghetto on him. That's right…sue him till the only way he'll be cashing a check is at Cash Advance and he'll be so broke he will be putting his utility bills in his kid’s name.

Just sayin’.

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