"When are you going to stop screwing your ex-wife?" -Jewel, Roosevelt
"I am Jewish and John is black. My mom is gonna fu*king die when she finds out." - Eleven City Diner, 11th & Wabash
"Where the hell did I park? I hate when you forget where I parked. That's your job." -Ford City Mall
"I don't like the way you talk to me. So what if you are 6? I am going to smack you." -Olive Garden, Bedford Park
Thanks so much for reading. Feel free to leave your comments in the section below and while you are at it, follow me on Twitter @TheRealJoyRene
Yep, you're welcome!