Sure, you're attractive enough.
There are a lot of guys that pay attention to you and many may slide you their number.
However, there is something missing:
You haven't got your sexy under control. It hasn't been cultivated and it is lying dormant under years of society placed restraints and laws.
Now this "sexy" I am talking about has nothing to do with highlights and red lipstick.
It is South Side Sexy that will get you the attention you are looking for, ladies.
You do not have to live on the South Side to obtain this high level of sexiness. All you need is a chick that has an inside connection to help you out.
That's me. I am YOUR chick.
Here is my quick guide to being "South Side Sexy."
°Finish A Whole Beer Without Whining.
Do you realize how annoying it is for a guy to hang at the Sports Bar with his girl only to have her sit and complain about the taste of beer?
You wanted a draft now you have one. No one wants to hear you complain that it tastes like piss when you don't even know what piss tastes like (I hope).
°Know Your City's Teams
The least you can do is learn what teams play for Chicago.
A big plus is understanding how the games are played. If you don't understand, a man will be happy to indulge and explain it all.
The worst thing you can do is fake the funk and pretend to be sport savy.
Everyone will know once you mention how sad you were when Sammy Sosa left the Bulls.
Nothing says sexy more than a woman who isn't afraid of a little dirt. It won't kill you to go on a fishing trip and actually learn to cast a rod.
However, if you don't want to put worms on a hook...I am 100% behind you.
°Eating Is Allowed
No one will ever uncover the mystery that drives women to pretend they don't eat.
"I'll have the salad." only means "I am going to mouth vacuum all the food in my fridge when this date is over."
If you are hungry, eat, dammit.
That's common sense.
°Don't Hesitate To Speak Up
Being a puppet is not at all attractive. Speak your mind if there is something you want to express.
Don't go with the flow if it does not agree with your plan.
My dad would say,"The one with the closed mouth is the one with the sore asshole."
Hum..let's leave assholes out of this.
Being upfront with your feelings shows that you are a woman who knows what she wants (and avoids soreness).
That is damn sexy!
°Do Not Try To Convert Your Man Into A Woman
Sounds harsh, doesn't it? I am sure you believe you've never done this but I assure you that you have.
All women have been culprits to this massive crime.
If you have ever forced your man to do something with you that is normally something you do with your girlfriends:
It isn't right to ask your guy to go shoe and dress shopping with you. Nor is it acceptable to drag him to see "Magic Mike."
There are some things that we as woman should do only with other women.
Please feel free to leave comments and while you are at it, follow me on Twitter @TheRealJoyRene.
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