What We Sox Fans Are Not....

What We Sox Fans Are Not....

The Crosstown Classic is here and we Sox fans have to travel to Wrigleyville this morning to cheer on our beloved team! Like every other year, we have to be faced with the insults and name calling. Let me tell you, we will not take it anymore! I am going to debunk the South Side Sox Fan Stereotypes that have plagued us for years:

#1. We are NOT fall down, sloppy drunks.

I have NEVER fallen down while drunk and I try to keep my hair in place by keeping a twin can holster beer hat on my head. I wouldn't call that "sloppy". Besides, I have gone out with Cub fans and they have introduced me to a higher level of drinking. It's called bar hopping. After hitting two bars on Division, I call it pub crawling. We Sox fans have a thing called "Bar Hugging". We hit one bar, make friends with everyone there and hug it out with everyone before we leave.

#2. Our Women Are NOT Loose.

Female Sox fans are not easy. Just because I lift my shirt up and yell, "Woooo!" while jumping around, does not mean you can take me home. It just means my boobs are better than your girlfriend's who happens to be wearing a Cubs shirt. It's sort of a provocation in the FANimal wilderness. I am marking my territory.

#3. Sox Fans Are Brawlers

Ok, Sox Fans do not fight EVERYWHERE. We only fight when appropriate. An insult toward any one on the lineup, managers, past or present and even bat boys is like saying, "Yo mama." If someone said, "Yo mama" to you, you would fight, right? I'm not saying it is a good thing to do, I'm just saying, keep my mama's name (lineup, managers, bat boys, concession stand workers, janitors, hotdog vendor) out of your mouth...with a smile on my face

#4. South Siders Are Sore Losers

Ok, this is how I reacted when we lost our spot in the playoffs: Imagine People's Hernandez in Shaft. It's a little graphic, so click with caution. Yet, I am one fan, not millions. We don't all react this way.

Listen (or read), South Side Sox Fans are peaceful human beings who just have an undying (stalker-like) love for our team. Don't fight with us..just hug it out, man. We'll be at the neighborhood bar if you need us...

Please comment below with thoughts! Share with your friends and follow me on Twitter @TheRealJoyRene

Yep...You're Welcome!

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  • By the way, have you talked to the Ligue "shirtless father and son team" lately? Of course, that is so 10 years ago.

    And, as far as the women, be sure to wear a low cut shirt so you can be on the Bud Fan Cam. At least the Sox don't do that.

  • It is a drastic difference from the venues to the fans that support them. I'm a transplant to Chicago, so I don't have a 'Team'..I've lived on the Southside just blocks away from 'COMINSKY'..yeah I said it!...and saw the fireworks after every HR...and I've lived North and witnessed the 'Passion'...I cheer for both..and at Crosstown time..I pull for . But..I will say at SOX games the sport is actually observed!
    Oh, and your Shaft clip subtitled in whatever Asian language that was was classic as hell! Let's Go Good Game

  • I know, I know..the Peoples Hernandez thing was extreme. NO, I didnt get shot but I am still recovering from the ice pick injury.

    Yes, I am dramatic.

    I love Chicago teams and if one makes it all the way, I will still support and celebrate the victory. :-)

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