How to Get a Date with Victoria's Secret Model Doutzen Kroes

How to Get a Date with Victoria's Secret Model Doutzen Kroes

First off, you have to understand the world through my eyes, in which, anything is possible. What can I say, I'm a dreamer, and for something like this, you almost have to be. But, honestly I'm starting this blog post with no particular plan in mind. I just saw this incredible holiday video featuring her, below, and figured, there has to be a way.

And while I'm thinking of "that way", why not share it with you. Hmmm, now, to think of a step 1. Actually, yeah, step 1 is pretty obvious.

Step 1 - Get Noticed

I'm guessing this would have to go along the same lines of any girl and would need to rely on recognition. It's not enough to just blend into the crowd, you've gotta stand out, just not in a creepy, stalkerish kind of stand out way. Luckily, in this case, with dream girl Doutzen Kroes, I actually haven't done much investigating about the girl outside of what I saw from the aforementioned video. I don't know age, height, weight, hometown, nothin'! So right away, we rule out stalkery. But you've gotta do something to stand out.

Unfortunately, in the world of beautiful models and famous women, your chances of standing out are very slim. UNLESS, maybe you're a dancer, or a photographer orrrrrrr the catering guy who's working the photo shoot that day. Actually, you don't want to be the catering guy, because nobody wants to DATE the catering guy. Yeah, they're fun to joke with on the set, but you're not going to tell your friends "hey, I'm dating the catering guy". Kind of like the janitor at a school. No matter how cute he might be, no teacher wants to hang out in the teacher's lounge and say, "oh, me and the janitor got it on!"

Step 2 - Be Prepared To Walk Away

Much like negotiating on the beach in Cabo San Lucas for that Nacho Libre mask you think is just so funny, you've gotta always be prepared to walk away. Let's face it, you get to attached to something, you get clingy. You get clingy, you get dependent. You get dependent you get weird...and nobody likes weird. There can be a "strange" kind of funny and cute...but weird...yeah, nobody goes for weird. So here's the thing in this case, and the same thing you'd apply to any girl. Yes, there is certainly something to be said for the time vested into pursuing that individual, but you can't depend on it. So in this case, with dream girl Doutzen Kroes, there is not one part of my mind that says she is absolutely the only girl for me. Ohhhhh, dude! I just thought of step 3.

doutzen-kroes-headshotStep 3 - Want, Don't Need

Here's the thing, if you want the girl, that's one thing and that's amazing. You should always want to be with someone, and in their case, who doesn't like feeling wanted. Granted, dream girl Doutzen Kroes is wanted by a lot of dudes...probably all the time, but still, it's not want from me! I mean, it is now, but whatever, you get what I'm trying to say. You've gotta want to be that person, because if you want to be, then you're prepared to walk away. If you NEED to be with that person, then you're dependent on them and then shit gets weird. See how this is all just an amazing circle.

Step 4 - Have Some Confidence

I feel like when this is brought up, sometimes we have a tendency to think "yeah, well maybe for some people, but not for ME." Which, I'm not gonna lie, could very well be the case. You could be super unattractive and have no chance at dating dream girl Doutzen Kroes. But whaddya want, man?! That's part of your personality. You're a downer, a disbeliever and nobody wants someone who is just going to bring them down. Where's your hope, your dreams?! And more than just the HOPE that someone is going to bring home a bag of shredded cheese for your tortilla chips so you can make microwave nachos, I'm talking some REAL hope here. The hope that you only get one run at this life and that it's yours to do with it what you want. You want to sit around a be a putz, all yours. Me? I'm gonna date dream girl Doutzen Kroes.

dawson-crying
Don't be a little James VanderBitch, walk over and say something

Step 5 - Say Something to Her

Here is where you and I must go our separate ways, friend. In your world, you might have already met your dream girl. Perhaps you run into her a couple times a week in the break room at work. Or it's your buddy's girlfriend's friend that you saw at that one party but didn't have the guts to say anything to her. Whatever your situation is, it's up to YOU to make it happen.

Stop letting life happen to you! Grab it by it's fart-ridden, tighty whitey underwear and wedgie yourself into the life you want to lead. If it's with that girl, then make it happen. All I could really do is write a blog post about dream girl Doutzen Kroes...but in my world...she sees it!

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  • You missed the only one that really counts: have millions of dollars.

  • In reply to publiusforum:

    and a jet.

  • I thought you had actual advice, but this use of the Internet is not much different than the more profitable one called porn, and probably with the same result.

  • Great blog and great use of your resources. Best of luck, hope she reads it!

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