Learning to Take Full Advantage…
By Liz Lampkin
How many times in life have you failed to take advantage of an opportunity?
How many times have you missed an awesome shoe sale because you forgot about it, or didn’t realize it was happening? How many times have you missed the beauty of watching the sun set, or opening a book and reading it in silence?
As I continue to move forward on my path of life, there is one thing that I have learned to take full advantage of that is often over looked by so many women. What, you ask?
I’ve learned to take full advantage of my life as a single woman!
More often than not, we as single women make three mistakes that prevent us from taking full advantage of living productive lives as single women.
1. The first mistake we make is spending most of our single lives seeking a relationship for the possibility of marriage.
I know many of you may be thinking, why is this a mistake? Isn’t the whole point of being single to find a mate suitable for marriage? Absolutely not! First and foremost, if you are an unmarried woman, and you are a believer in God you should know that as a woman it is not your job to seek your mate, it is your job to be sought out by him for marriage. I don’t know how many times I’ve heard women say, “I’m looking for a man” or “I’m gonna find my husband this year…” and so on without realizing that seeking a mate and marriage is not your primary purpose for being single.
2. The second mistake is we engage in relationships that last or fade quickly without learning lessons from them.
Each relationship we engage in with someone has a purpose, and when it is over we should take some time to reflect on what happened before, during and after the relationship. We should take some time to observe our character from all aspects after the relationship, and ask ourselves self-reflective questions about our reasons and rationale behind what we did or did not do during the course of the relationship. Additional questions you should ask yourself are: How did I make this man a better person, how did he make me a better person, and what lesson(s) did I learn that I can take with me and apply to my next relationship? The only way you can learn and grow from each relationship is to ask questions and answer honestly.
3. The third mistake we as single women make that prevents us from taking full advantage of being single is that we miss out on learning our purpose as single women.
What many women often fail to realize is that while you are single, you have a greater purpose to fulfill before you get married….if you get married. We spend so much of our time focusing on marriage, having children, having a home, or staying busy with our careers and hobbies that we miss out on our true purpose, or we tend to think that getting married is our purpose.
How do you discover your purpose as a single woman? Pray and ask God to reveal it to you, and when He speaks to your heart be receptive of what is said. I know many of you may be thinking, I know this, and I’ve done that, but I’m still tired of being single and I just want to be married! I’m tired of being lonely, and I want kids! If these are your thoughts, ask yourself these questions about your desires for a relationship and or marriage: 1.What are my reasons for desiring marriage? 2. Do I want to be a wife or a married woman? 3. Am I ready to be found by my husband and not by another boyfriend? 4. Am I a reflection of the man I desire?
Single ladies I encourage you today to take full advantage of being single and appreciate this gift that is often short-lived. Find out what your purpose is and move forward in it. Learn to see the beauty of being single, be encouraged today while walking in singleness…embrace it, live it out loud and be proud!
Liz Lampkin is a woman of God, Educator, Speaker, Mother, Sister, Daughter, Friend, and Encourager living in purpose on purpose. Follow her on Twitter @Liz_Lampkin
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