The Rules of Holiday Shopping: Avoid the Trick Bag!

The Rules of Holiday Shopping: Avoid the Trick Bag!

By A Comeaux

Well ladies and gents, tis' that season again...!

No matter what you do or don't celebrate, chances are you'd like an embellished box of something delectable with your name on it. C'mon admit it. I mean let's be honest, who doesn't like gifts...? The issue isn't this. It's not about the gift itself. It's about it's giver. We can buy our own trinkets and treats.

The task at hand is to know from whom to expect a gift from and this must be figured out FAST!!
I've pulled a few collectives together to gather a trail of thoughts. For sake of the hopeful and the hopeless, we need to cover all corners so no one is left empty-handed or ass-faced.

Ever spent $200 on a gift to exchange and yours was worth a mere $20? with tax?!? Or how about when you didn't know you two were 'that serious' to exchange so you purchased the perfunctory pj's and socks, while your gift was planned since August...!

We all need to be on the same shopping wave, my friends. Long gone are the thoughtless $25 gift cards! And whoever repeats 'it's the thought that counts' obviously doesn't Think for themselves! Our thoughts, in truth, tell us very damn well when we're skimping! And it's too cold outside to be skimpy!

I wrote this for guys and gals alike. My only ambition is that you know what season you're approaching and you do it with caution.

Now I can't speak for all of you so I'll throw my logic out there for you to chew what you need and leave the rest be... If you call me more than five times in a week, I'm expecting a gift. If you text me daily, I'm expecting a gift. If I return ANY of these gestures over half the time, you can expect that I'm not only expecting a gift, you can expect one too. ;)
See people, you can't be out here sending mixed signals. You can't low-key date me and then stiff me on a gift. You can't taste my holiday punch and snack on my goodies if you don't plan to put in on the pot, get my drift...?
This is an opportune time for you to hit the ground running if you don't want to gift, or be gifted upon. Stay out of sight until that fateful corporate sponsored office party and then cordially resurface with a friendly text inviting your ditched upon counterpart out for free drinks and dancing. Bada boom. Bada bam. 
I'm not insensitive. I'm a woman. I adore nice things, sure. But I, too, have a list and most 99% of my boos don't make it. This isn't a hidden fact.

I'm an open book when it comes to things like this because I don't want to be gifted when I'm empty handed no more than I want to give to the 'I didn't know what to get you' guy!

Oh, and do not, I repeat, DO NOT tag along while someone shops for gifts if you're not exchanging and/or willing to chip in.

It may not be said, but you'll be judged! Its a nonverbal rule. Heck, a law! We ALL have a mall rat who'd love to shop til we drop, we don't need any spectators or tight wads going along for the ride.
If you agree with me, tag or repost this 'conveniently' for "others" to see, ya know, drop a friendly hint ;)
When it comes to gifting, be clear and direct! Great gifts induce false hope at times too, but that's a later blog. I need to save some of you from embarrassment first. We'll deal with overachievers another time ;)
Hope this helps... Just ask yourself, what's it really worth to gift or not to gift when the pockets in question?

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