People make being by yourself sound like it’s the worst thing in the world, don’t they?
We hear things like “two heads are better than one,” or “I didn’t want to get caught eating lunch by myself,” and, of course, “you need to get married, so you won’t grow old alone" all the time.
The funny thing about being alone, though, is that it’s often when we’re by ourselves that we really get to learn how powerful and capable we truly are.
Think about it: How would you ever have learned how to ride a bike if your parents didn’t eventually let go? Who would have known that you were the most competent person in your office, if you weren’t stuck picking up the slack for your entire team? And let’s be honest, it wasn’t until you had your heart broken that you learned you could rely on yourself for happiness.
You see, it’s when we believe we need the help of others that we oftentimes need to look inward, or, perhaps, upward for assistance.
That’s how I’ve derived strength over and over again; going it alone when I most needed help.
Just the other night, I found myself locked out of my house. Nobody else was home. My first instinct was to use my cell phone to call for help, but, of course, that’s when my phone died. I began pulling on the door and yelling “open,” like if I did that enough times the door would somehow hear me and come ajar. When that didn’t work, I started digging around under rocks, hoping I’d find a spare key (no, we’ve never kept a spare under any rocks, but that’s how irrational I was by this point). After that didn’t work, I just started whispering “Jesus” in hopes that he would drop out of the sky and open the door for me. No, that didn’t work either (just in case you were wondering).
I sat down on my steps and got ready to cry because, I really needed help, but nobody was there to help me. What popped into my mind, though, were the words of one of my best friend’s mothers. She told me, “you ALWAYS have everything you need, God set it up that way.”
Then I thought, “That’s a super ironic thing to be thinking right now….what the HECK do I have?! My key is in my house and my phone is dead.”
When I calmed down for two seconds, though, I realized that while my house key was missing, I still had my car key. I drove around the corner to a drug store, asked to borrow a phone and called my dad, who was there in 15 minutes with a spare.
And with that, I felt empowered.
You can feel that way, too.
Just remember, when you’re facing a crisis on your own, you’ve not been abandoned, God gave you what you need.
You’re your solution.
Sylvia Snowden is a fabulous Chicago-based journalist and the President of Always Onyx. Follow Sylvia on Twitter @TrulySylvia
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