Single Quiz: Rate Your (self as a) Mate

There are so many tests, quizzes and polls that ask what kind of lover you are, what type of leader you'll be, and--my personal favorite--what your Transformer name is. The point of many of these quizzes is for entertainment, to discover something new about yourself, or to reaffirm what you already knew. With all the different assessments going around I've yet to come across a recent one that allows singles to assess what kind of mate they would be. Why is that necessary? So we can truly understand what we have to offer our future soulmates and really discover if we're the type of person someone would want a relationship with. If you decide to take this quiz you must do the following: be completely honest with your answers, tally your score at the end, reflect on the type of mate you'll be, and ask yourself , "would I want to date me?" Have fun!

1.I'm a fabulous listener. I give my undivided attention, make eye contact, show interest by using the appropriate gestures at the right time, and I make sure I understand what's being said by asking questions.
a) Absolutely, listening is one of my strongest qualities.
b) I often hear, but fail to listen.
c) What'd you say?

2. I anticipate the needs of others, and meet them by being in tune with their desires. I    regularly put others needs in front of my own. 

a) Absolutely, I'm selfless to a fault.
b) I'm this way sometimes, but not too often.
c) Never, I'm as selfish as they come.

3. I believe my mate should be my best friend, someone I can confide in, laugh and grow with.
a) Absolutely, friends make the nest lovers and long-time partners.
b) Maybe, sometimes you connect without being friends first.
c) I don't think you don't have to be friends.

4. I give to others without expecting anything in return.
a) Always, I give until it hurts.
b) I expect something in return sometimes.
c) No way. If I'm giving, I should be getting.

5. I'm willing to pay for dates.
a) Absolutely, I firmly believe in contributing to the relationship in any way I can.
b) I'm okay with picking up the tab sometimes.
c) No way, I deserve to be wined and dined all the time.

6. I believe people must be equally yoked to have a successful relationship.
a) Absolutely, it's important to share the same spiritual identity.
b) Maybe, but as long as my mate believes in a higher power, I'm okay with that.
c) I don't even know what this means!

7. I understand that no one is perfect, and I don't expect them to be. I'm accepting of others' weaknesses, and I'm willing to help them strengthen them.
a) Absolutely, everyone is flawed in some way. That's what makes them human.
b) I'm fine with weaknesses as long as they don't hinder our progress.
c) They should be close to perfection, if not they should work towards it.

8. I have a positive reputation, and a pleasing disposition. Everyone who interacts with me gets good vibes.
a) Absolutely, I spread sunshine everywhere I go!
b) I'm unsure, but this is something I need to think about.
c) I've got some work to do.

9. I'm honest to a fault, yet tactful. I believe in telling someone the truth to help them become a better person.
a) Absolutely, honesty is the best policy in all relationships.
b) I lie sometimes to protect someone's feelings, or to protect myself.
c) I'm super blunt, and have no regard for others feelings.

10. I have a growth mindset, and I'm willing to discover new things.
a) Absolutely! I love progression in every way!
b) Sometimes, but I am slightly uncomfortable with stepping outside of my comfort zone.
c) No way. I hate change.

11. I respect the opinions of others, and I've learned to pick and choose my battles wisely.
a) Absolutely. Everyone has something valuable to add to a relationship.
b) I like to debate about things, but not too often.
c) I love fighting!

12. My life is drama free. 
a) Absolutely, the only drama I engage in is on a stage.
b) I have a few internal and external issues I need to focus on.
c) Love and Hip-Hop me all the way!

13. I encourage healthy disagreements for growth.
a) Absolutely. Expressing differences are what makes relationships hot!
b) Sometimes, but I really don't like to argue.
c) I don't like arguing, but if I do I want to win!

14. I'm versatile and offer new experiences for mental, spiritual, emotional, and financial growth.
a) Absolutely! Variety is the spice of life, and I'm that spice!
b) I like to try new things, but I can often get stuck in neutral.
c) I may be a little boring.

15. I've mastered the art of compromise. I firmly believe and practice give and take so my relationships can be rewarding for both parties. 
a) Absolutely. Everything can;t always be about me.
b) I either give too much, or not enough. I have to find balance.
c) It's my way or the high way!

16. I believe that teamwork makes the dream work in all relationships. All relationships should be equal partnerships.
a) Absolutely, 50/50 all the way!
b) I'm indifferent about this.
c) One person is definitely the boss.

17. I patiently practice patience. 
a) Absolutely! Patience is everything!
b) I need more help in this area of my life.
c) I have no patience whatsoever.

18. I communicate with others effectively. I won't allow my mate to guess what's wrong with me. I'll respect them  and our relationship enough to inform them of any issue I may have with them. I'm also willing to work towards a resolution that will benefit both of us. 
a) Absolutely, effective communication is the root of any great relationship.
b) I can improve in this area.
c) I don't communicate effectively at all.

19. I am a great conversationalist. I listen to understand before I respond. I also know how to conduct meaningful, engaging conversations. 
a) Absolutely, I start conversations to captivate and stimulate myself and others.
b) I'm Chatty Kathy!
c) I don't talk much. In fact, I hate people who talk too much!

20. Fidelity is a trait I value and possess. When I'm involved with someone, I'm completely committed to them and the work it'll take for our relationship to thrive.
a) Absolutely! I'm loyal to a fault.
b) I believe in monogamy, but if uncommitted then I'll actively date.
c) I struggle with loyalty in more ways than one.

All done, now let's tally up your scores! For every question you answered A, give yourself 3 points, B give yourself 2 points, and C 1 point.

If you scored between 50-60, you can consider yourself an ideal mate, not only in romantic relationships but in all relationships. You're someone who's selfless and takes action to meet the needs of others for their happiness because it makes you happy. You understand that effective communication is key, you possess an open mind set, and you're willing to grow for the sake of your relationships and yourself. While you aren't the perfect mate, you will be an amazing partner. And if you haven't stumbled across the perfect person for you, don't stress. They'll be along in plenty of time. Besides, you're worth the wait.

If you scored between 30-49, you're considered to be an ideal mate who acknowledges the fact that you have some growing to do (as we all do), but you're someone who's ready for a relationship and you'll put forth the best effort to make things work. You may be a little self-centered and expect things to go your way from time to time, but that's okay. Everyone deserves a pat on the back; but if you're planning to have a productive, monogamous, long-term relationship, it's imperative that you learn how to put others' needs before your own.

If you scored below 3o, you're not quite ready for a relationship. And you know what? That's perfectly fine. You're currently at a point in your life where you are working on who you are, and in the process of discovering the type of mate you'll be if you decide that monogamy is your destiny. You're using this time alone to reflect on relationships from your past, healing from heartbreak, and taking time to enjoy your single life. So does this score mean you don't have what it takes to be a quality mate? Absolutely not! It simply means a relationship is not your thing at the present moment.

No matter what your score was on this quiz never doubt the person you are, and embrace the person you're becoming for your own happiness. If it's meant to be for you to have a relationship, then the person who's designed for you will take you as you are. If you didn't see a trait on this list of items for an ideal mate, let me know below what you think makes a great partner. Until next time, live happily ever present, no matter what your present state is.

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