Living life as a single woman is an unsung adventure often overlooked. This is the time for traveling, discovering who you are, building your career or brand, developing lifelong friendships, so on and so on. It is a gift during life that has so much to offer, and allows a person (people) to grow as an individual. Unfortunately there are a lot of women who don't see the beauty of it, primarily because their focus is on finding the man of their dreams, getting married and living the remainder of their days in marital bliss. While there's nothing wrong with wanting a mate to settle down with, there's nothing wrong with living single. More often than not, many women fail to take the time to understand what the single life is all about. This happens because their minds have been filled with the many misconceptions that exist about being single. So it's high time to reveal a few single truths every unwed woman (and maybe even a few married women) should embed in her heart and spirit to give them a sense of pride about their relationship status.
Truth 1: Your Happily Ever After Begins with You
Having a loving relationship with someone who brings a different sense of joy to your life is a remarkable feeling. However, your mate should never be the main source of your bliss. Your happiness begins, maintains and ends with you. The decisions you make, the actions you take, and your overall attitude about life are the factors that help keep feelings of internal joy. A relationship should add different facets of excitement to your world because of what you and your partner contribute to the union. That way both parties can share in equal satisfaction. Never depend on someone else to make you completely happy, or you'll find yourself in a world of never ending misery.
Truth 2: There is No Set Age Where You Should Get Married
Where is it written that a woman must be married by a certain age for her life to have meaning? Or that she must be married by a particular age to enjoy marriage? Ladies, if you've never heard it before, hear it now...you do not have to be married by a certain age, I repeat, you do not have to be married age! I've always believed that what or whom ever God has for you, it is designed specifically for you, and God will deliver whenever He sees fit to do so. So take a deep breathe, stop pressuring yourself to find a mate and searching for places to position yourself to be found. But instead start living your single life to the fullest!
Truth 3: Your Relationship Status Does Not Define You
Single. married, widowed, divorced, or it's complicated (whatever that means) are terms that are used to describe a person's relationship status. However, the mistake many women make is that they allow a relationship status to to define who they are. We all know the type. Those who are constantly updating their social media status', and others who say they are a 'single woman', or 'happily married' one. While there's nothing wrong with making people aware of your standing in or out of love it's important to recognize the fine line of letting people know your status, and letting it define who you are. Ladies if you find yourself letting your relationship status lead the way of your existence, take some time to reflect on who you are. Make a list of words you believe define you. Be honest with yourself, and learn about the person you were, are and aspire to be. You'd be surprised at what you discover and how fabulous you are all on your own.
Truth 4: Your Purpose for Being Single is Not to Get Married
I know many women don't believe this to be true, but it is. Everyday you are blessed to wake up is a chance to walk and serve in the purpose you were created for. You were not created to prepare yourself to be a wife, but to serve as you are led, and focus on uplifting others. If your heart and mind is geared only towards marriage then you may miss out on the opportunity to work and walk in the plans that have been laid out for you. Stop wasting time searching for a husband, or positioning yourself to be found by someone, and find out what your purpose is.
Truth 5: There's Nothing Wrong With You
Just because you're single does not mean you are undesirable, or unworthy of finding and keeping love. It simply means that the right person for you is not ready to walk into and stay in your life. Never doubt who are, or attempt to change yourself to meet someone else's standards to keep them. There is someone designed especially for you, and you for them. Wait patiently for them, and know that you are worth the wait just the way you are.
Truth 6: Being Single is a Gift!
Being single is a valuable journey in life that is often taken for granted. For so long, women have been misled about the single life, and so focused on marriage that they fail to see the beauty of this designated time. This is the time of life where you learn who you are, and celebrate you whether someone else wants to celebrate you or not. It's not a time of preparation for marriage, it's not a time to seek or be sought out by potential mates, but it's the time when you develop a profound relationship with your Creator, and discover who are. Ladies take advantage of this time and enjoy it to the max! Don't over look this gift because whether you want to believe it or not, the grass may not be as green as you think it on the other side.
Ladies celebrate your singleness, and stand tall and proud in it. This is the time in your life where you can celebrate you for who you were created to be. Lock these single truths in your heart, and stay encouraged. Look at what’s in front of you and not who’s around you, and focus on finding your purpose as a single woman. It is only then you will find true happiness.
Liz Lampkin is the Author of Are You a Reflection of the Man You Pray For? As a motivational speaker, and advocate for single women she inspires single women to search their souls rather than searching for a soul mate. She also inspires them to live their best single lives God's way! Follow her on Twitter @Liz_Lampkin.