The Art of Getting Plowed

Okay so it's not what you think - this has nothing to do with drinking but everything to do with snow plowing! Amid this horribly cold, snowy and windy winter we're having - the art of getting plowed has alot to do with what area you live in whether in Chicago or the suburbs. I am lucky enough to live in an unincorporated area of far northern Gurnee and I must give a huge shout-out to our plow guys (or gals) because they do an exemplary job of keeping our subdivisions streets clear even during the worst of this polar outburst. I'm pretty sure they work for the county and in this regard, our tax dollars are being well spent. I can compare our streets to other areas because I've traveled around during January and cannot believe how horrible the side streets are in other areas including Chicago's side streets, streets in Evanston and other northern suburbs. No one else's roads are as clean and passable as ours.

Through wind and snow, ice and sleet, our gallant snow removal team has insured us safe travels and easy access to the outside world since the beginning of all this horror called winter 2013-14. They have been on the job so often I worry about them losing it - going snow blind or freezing to death in the cab of their mighty plow trucks. Talk about earning your keep - they have all done so and then some this year.

Today's low high temperature (I say low high because it is impossible to say high temperature when talking about zero degrees) is the icing on the frozen cake and the streets are spotless in my neighborhood other than being white with salt. Not a speck of snow or ice can been seen and it's clear sailing. Most of us would like to be sailing off to anywhere right now - except that the thought of getting on a cruise ship is even more frightening after all of the recent disastrous trips like the one this week where over 600 people have gotten sick and they're headed to port in New Jersey - look out Jersey - the puke boat is headed to your shore! Get out the sick bags and the port-a-potties to accommodate those poor passengers! In other words, look out below!

Yes, I, like many of you, would rather be anywhere but here but at least the sun's out today! Look on the bright side if there is one - traffic is light because all of the schools are closed, stores are half empty and the only place you'll see lots of people is at your local gas station as everyone tries to keep their gas tanks full so their cars don't freeze up out in this bitter cold place called the Midwest. So get tanked up, get plowed, get soused, get stinkin' drunk - I don't blame any of you as this winter continues to take its toll on our bodies, our cars, our heating bills and our streets. I bet there aren't many of you that don't have white cars right now with all of the salt on them. And who doesn't have salt on their boots, their mittens, their coats and their entryway floors!

The art of getting plowed can mean several things - drinking many margaritas with salt on the rim, sliding on the icy streets (but not in my part of Gurnee!) and get smashed by another car; or having a beautiful big yellow truck come roaring down your street with blades of glory and salt galore.Thank you to all of the wonderful, diligent snow plow drivers from Warren Township - you have literally swept us off our sleet (and snow and ice!!!!).





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