Be here now, no matter where you are

My dad is in the hospital today.

This is a difficult time for him, but in many ways he is calm and present.

Yesterday he said to me, “You know, growing old is a hassle.”

Such a great word – growing old isn’t awful, bad, scary, just a hassle.

Then he said with a smile, “But this is what it is, I’m old.”

Such acceptance in this statement, a calm appreciation for what “is”.

My dad is dealing with a lot, but he is easy to be around.  I enjoy talking with him.

There is no anger or feeling that it should be different.  He is kind and funny with his nurses because he appreciates the help. And they are kind and caring with him.

They don’t know for sure what day he is going home, it depends on so many things.

So we get to be here, in the now.  We are present.

It is a challenge to embrace this, to live this, on a regular basis – especially when we are young, “busy”, and moving from one thing to the next.  But as we move from one thing to the next, we miss reality.

We are trying to get “somewhere”, but age and experience inevitably teach us there is nowhere else to be.

We think we will be happy when (fill in the blank), but we won’t (or at least not for long).  We will just move onto the next goal believing it will make us really happy.

But it won’t.

The reason life feels fast is because we aren’t experiencing it.  We are in our head thinking about something else, waiting for something better, hoping for something more.

And we’re missing it.

We miss being here; we miss living now.

Because nothing else is real - the past, even two seconds ago, is gone and the future literally doesn’t exist.

And when we wake up and realize we’ve been stuck in our worries and wishes, and the only real place we can be is here, we find the peace we have been searching for in all the wrong places.

I am grateful to be here, right now, in this hospital room with my dad and the rest of my family.

It’s a good place to be.

Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans. ~ John Lennon

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  • Thinking of my EIU companion, you and your family Chof.

    You are so right.... Live in the now, appreciate what you have and be thankful. One never knows when life changes at a moment's notice.

  • In reply to Jives22:

    Thanks Jerry - you have always been really good at being in the moment - that's why people like you so much. :) I love you, and I love that you still call me Chof. xo

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    Another great reminder from my amazing wife...

  • In reply to Todd Adams:

    love and thanks :) xo

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    Cathy, your dad's ability to focus on the present, to accept what life is in this moment, is one of the lessons you consistently teach as a parenting coach, as a women's circle leader, and as a friend. Thank you for taking a moment during your time with your family to share this with us. Focusing on the gifts in life during times of "hassle" can be so hard. Your dad is a good teacher, too.

  • In reply to Deb Casey:

    Thanks Deb - he is a great teacher and my mom is, too. She is handling everything so well. My whole family loves to use humor in difficult situations - it serves us well and reminds us what is important. A laugh in the midst of chaos can be so healing!

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