Becoming a self-aware person, becoming a self-aware parent

I remember when I was 16 and I got my first speeding ticket.

I ran in the house sobbing - not only did I have a $50 ticket to pay, but I believed it wasn’t fair, it wasn’t my fault, and why me?

So my mom said something, most likely to soothe me, but it did much more than that.

It woke me up.

“Maybe the police officer stopped you to keep you safe – you could have gotten in an accident down the road…maybe this was actually a good thing.”

I remember it like it was yesterday - I remember where I was, what the room smelled like, and what I was wearing.

In that moment I realized that maybe something bigger was at work, that life was not just about me, that the universe was a friendly place.

I actually think I “remembered” the universe was a friendly place – because as a kid I always felt safe – I inherently knew it was all about love and trust.

But confusion set in as I grew and experienced life, because sometimes I felt pain, I saw other people in pain, and I experienced disappointment and fear.

It didn’t always work out the way I wanted, but deep down I knew life was good.  I didn’t understand how it all worked, but deep down I trusted.

But as a kid I couldn’t explain it, I simply didn’t have the words.  Sometimes I still don’t.  But that doesn’t stop me from trying to write about it or talk about it.

And I know for sure that a simple comment from my mom was one of my many turning points, an “aha” moment, a resonance from the deepest part me  - it jump-started a path back to myself, a path that has had many bumps, starts, and lulls, but one that is fully mine.

I know that life is meant to be enjoyed.  I know that much of our pain and suffering comes from the way we think.  I know that truth comes from our heart.  I know that love is the only thing that is real.

And I know that kids know this.  But usually with love and great intentions, we teach them differently.  We teach them to not trust, we teach them to listen to everyone but themselves, we teach them to fear.

It is important for children to have education and information, but they also need to know that they can trust who they are and that their inner knowing, their gut, is a map for their life.

If they follow the messages from their heart, they will know great love (and not just romantic love…I’m talking about love of self, work, friends, school, interests...love in every aspect of life).

Their choices may not make sense to us, but that’s because it is not our life.  We are meant to live our own lives and follow our own dreams.  Our job is to take care of ourselves so we can better take care of others.  Our job is to know and live love so we can spread it around.

Of course we will have disappointment and pain, we are human and it’s the natural way of life.  But it’s not our natural state of being.  It’s just a feeling, a moment, a lesson to learn or an issue to process.

Once we honor these normal emotions and experiences, we can gradually get back to ourselves – our joy, our contentment, our peace of mind.

But too often we hold onto the experiences, the emotions, the challenges, and we forget to let them go.  We begin to live from what was or what could be instead of really being here.

And here is the only place we can be.

So in this blog I write about how to be here, enjoy life, live from love, and most important, how to teach this to our children.

I am a typical mother of three with everyday challenges, and like all human beings, I make plenty of mistakes.  But I know for sure that this is how I learn and grow – this is how I continue to become fully me.

And the full me loves to laugh, love, swear, cry, get mad, dance, rest, write, talk (a lot) and live with gratitude.  I am grateful and happy to be doing what I love.

And I am even more grateful that you chose, and hopefully choose, to read this blog.

Thank you for contemplating what I feel so inspired to share.

 

 

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