The last NFL game that I'm probably ever going to go to was last year around my birthday. A friend of mine had a couple of tickets and invited me along. The seats were great but the game was still boring. The only thing I liked was the close up view of the men in muscle gripping spandex. I could careless about the overpriced food. The majority white, drunk-before-the-first-quarter-ended crowd really wasn't my scene either.
At the start of the game, my friend and I didn't think twice about remaining seated for the national anthem. We sat and chatted to one another expressing our ambivalence to this so-called display of patriotism. I'm not a fan of celebrating war of any kind and during the time the song was created, that anthem did not apply to African Americans. America begrudgingly gave my family and I full citizenship about a half a century after this song was written.
Despite having a black president last year around this time, there was a still need to sit in opposition in protest to police brutality and in support of Colin Kaepernick. It was a small gesture, but the least I could do in support of the cause.
Fast forward; I'm sitting in Mexico today and watching the Charlottesville incident unfold from afar. As most black people, I'm dismayed but not the least bit shocked.
I'm not even surprised by the orange cheetoh's comments about the incident. He didn't outright pat the white nationalist protestors on the back and explicitly congratulate them on their display of solidarity. But he did let them know that he's in their corner and not ours (ours being defined as the rational thinking people who are often advocates of social justice). His comments seem to also communicate that oh yeah, he's working on getting them some jobs they've been supposedly been losing to globalization and affirmative action that's making them so angry.
After a string of non-stop racial injustices, I have gotten a bit emotionally numb this year. But I've also gotten intellectually sharper. It helps me understand that I'm going to need more focus and resources to protect myself, my family and my community.
So while my colleagues are going on tinder dates and the bars during their layover. I'm reading, writing and doing a bunch of other stuff to protect myself as a black woman and to protect my beautiful melaninated family.
Okay, hold up let me be honest honest, I'm still going to go on a few dates here and there, go salsa dancing on the weekends and enjoy my life and all that this world has to offer...
I will do all this while the racists stew and wish me and everyone who looks like me, dead.
I will sit at my computer blogging about whatever I want to; observing the Facebook post rants and sometimes commenting on the more progressive conversations. I will also donate money to bring a black man, a former football player imprisoned in China back to his effed up home in the U.S. because he's still better off here than he is there at the moment.
Yet, this is the world that I live in. A world when I spend a week every month in my favorite spot and arms length from the crazy sh#! happening at home. At the same time, I don't lose all grip with reality while I'm away. Besides, I can never fully escape even if I wanted to.
Instead, I deal with and try to make a difference (while staying sane and zen) the best way that I can.
Like reading my blog posts? Click here to subscribe!
Filed under: Uncategorized