The metamorphosis of a Mama

I’m not really sure what is going on, but something is definitely happening. I get in these moods every so often, yet I’m always shocked when it happens. It’s like my Hubby always says: “ I can be having a conversation with you about one topic, then you take a complete left turn and start talking about something else!”

Yea, I tend to do that. I’m a Pisces. I’m a writer. I’m left-handed. I’m that flighty chick that talks to herself while blogging at Starbucks. I’m that girl that will forget what you just told me 10 minutes ago, but I can quote a fight we had 8 years ago. Random shit flies out of mouth without a moment’s notice.  My attention span is that of a toddler, especially if you take 10 minutes to tell me something that could be told in 2 minutes. <Insert eye roll here>. I have 10,000 notebooks filled with ideas that I haven’t brought to fruition. My brain is like a computer that has 22 tabs open at once. Yet even with all this going on, people always commend me on being the most organized, put-together, balanced person they know.

I can always predict my unpredictability. Yet at times, like now, I do shit that comes completely from left field.

~ I’ve recently starting talking those thermogenic dietary supplements that have been sitting on my kitchen counter for months, because I’m sick of being so bloated and lethargic. I’m too young to feel this old.

~ I’ve been extremely conscious of everything I put in my mouth, with hopes that this will lead to a cleaner diet, which I’m hoping will lead to a thinner belly. Because that whole ‘I’m not pregnant, but I look pregnant’ look is wearing very thin. Damn.

~ I’ve changed the color of my hair to a brighter red. Almost orangey-red, honestly.  Because I feel this fits my personality better, fits whom I’m really feeling at the moment. Thank god I have an amazing stylist that patient enough to fulfill every whim I have. And give me everything I want, spot on.

~ I’m planning solo Amtrak trips to see friends and family. Because I suddenly feel the need to be near people that are not geographically close to me at the moment. A bit of the travel bug has been biting me hard recently. I have my roots well set where I am, but every once in a while I feel it’s good for the spirit to explore.

~ I’m making myself be more physically active then ever. I will allow myself 10 minutes to sit and eat a meal, but after that, my internal voice screams move, bitch! And I’m constantly downing as much water as possible. This whole dehydration thing is bullshit, and needs to be ended.

~ I’ve stopped getting my nails done, which is huge. I’ve had acrylics on-and-off for 20 plus years. But right now, I don’t feel the need anymore.  I’m ok with cutting, filing and treating them all on my own. Lord knows they will never be works of art from this point on, but, for some reason, it’s now ok. However, I will never give up the monthly pedicure. Nothing is more gross than a pair of feet that look like they could swoop down and catch their own prey. Ew.

~ I feel the need to connect to my besties, more than ever. It’s not like I’m dying or anything, it’s just a need that I can’t explain. I am blessed to have a small group of ladies that I absolutely adore. These ladies keep me sane, more then they will ever know. We’ve all been through so much shit at this point in our lives, so perhaps it’s time to meet, drink some wine, and talk about our shit together. Again. Always. Forever.

So what the hell is going on? I don’t know.

Am I getting back to basics? Possibly.

Am I going to allow this process happen? Absolutely.

 

Be sure to subscribe to follow me on this ridiculous journey. Could be quite interesting…

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