The 30-day sex challenge: Days 3 & 4

Day 3

I personally would like to thank Tony Soprano for this night.

My Hubby has been on a Sopranos kick recently, finally catching up where most of us have been for years. He’s now watching every single episode, from start to finish, as most of us did a decade ago.

He then raised a stink-eye to me, asking if this is why I’m with him.

Because he’s Italian? Because he’s a bit of a hard-ass? Because he has family values that I admire? Because he’ll do anything to provide for his family? Because he will take control in those rare moments when I choose to surrender?

Um, yes, and no, and yes, and yes, and YES PLEASE! When you spend most of your time expected to be in control, it’s nice to just…..surrender.

So that night, the theme was Domination. He led the way, and I eagerly followed. And everyone was happy.


Day 4

Tonight, the roles were reversed.

We still partook our nightly viewing of The Sopranos, but I decided to flip the switch.

Funny how the silliest things suddenly become full-blown porn. Without being porno-ish.

When we were finally together, I threw the demands at him. Scratch my back. Stroke my face. Massage my hair. Touch every unerogenous area of my body possible. Explore me. Drive me nuts with your fingertips. Don’t speak, because I just want to hear your breathe.

I was in control, and he didn’t hesitate. And in the end, everyone was happy.

What I’ve learned so far is something I’ve known for awhile: this isn’t about power nor prowess. It’s about listening to each other’s needs. A bit of give and take. And if you need to take more on some days, or completely give yourself to the other, it’s ok. If you have a partner who’s willing to do this, then your battle is almost won.

The challenge, however, is how to make this work in everyday life.

Let’s see how Day 5 goes….


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