Growing up, I never had a million friends. I was a band geek. I was a drama club junkie. My glasses were bigger than my face and use to wear Duran Duran and ‘Frankie Says’ t-shirts every day. I was quickly overlooked in the hallway and preferred to stand in the corner during a party. I only spoke when necessary and would be shocked when people would listen to me. My world was based on John Hughes movies and 33.5 “ records while my nose was shoved in a 500 page book.
I was a dork. My reality was small. And I was ok with this.
I had my small group of friends, but we were fiercely loyal. If you mess with me, I’ve got 5 other crazier bitches behind me to back me up. They taught me my first lesson in friendship.
Fast-forward 30-some years. I’ve traveled the world, met hundreds of people and have had experiences that would blow most people’s minds. And yet, I get asked the same question; if you could go back in time, would you do anything different?
My answer is always the same.
If I were given the gift of regressing to my childhood, would I do it? If I had a ‘Do Over’ card, would I take it? If a time machine were to plop in front of me, screaming of all the riches that 1983 promised me, would I jump in?
My answer is always the same.
Sure, aging sucks. My metabolism is shit, I’m in the early stages of perimenopause, my kids are up my ass 24/7 during summer break, and when Hubby looks at me the wrong way, I’m a fucking train wreck.
Hello Hormones? It’s Me, Tara.
I’ve met many. I’ve completely given myself to several. Everyone that has come into my life was there for a specific reason. I know this, and I respect every one of these people. I love what they have given to me, and I hope I had an impact in their life in return.
So now, at the ripe old age of 42, I have such a clear conscious of whom I choose to surround myself with.
Positive people. Those that appreciate who I was, and embrace who I am now. For those that allow me to dance in their kitchen without abandon. For those that are willing to bend an ear as I ask for advice, or allow me to cry without questions. To those that allow me to vent relentlessly. To appreciate my silly small moments or listen to me while I scream with joy during a huge life thrill. For those that pull me up at my weakest. To hug me without judgment. The confidence to share all my extreme highs and lows, uninhibited. Those that inspire me, build me up and help me become the most amazing person I never knew I could me.
This. Is. Huge!
Want to know the funny thing? Most people I completely rely on today are those same friends from childhood. They’ve loved me for this long, through sunshine and shit, and never judge. This has taught me my second lesson in friendship.
For those who discovered me later in life, you deserve triple gold stars. I was hell-gone from perfect, yet you love me still. I appreciate that. To be so lucky to find you at this point in my life is just that….fucking lucky!
Sure, my friendship list never has been nor ever will be huge, but I’m ok with that. Quality over quantity. And I sure as hell have a quality list going on. Namaste.
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