After a 3-year hiatus, I just this week re-entered the corporate world. Yea, I got the job, and I know I can do the job. But the big question is – am I really ready for the job? And the even bigger questions is – can my family handle this huge transition?
Hindsight is a beautiful thing. And now that I’ve survived this first week, I’ve come to realize that no matter how much things change, some things remain the same.
#1 – I still hate waking up early. Even if it’s waking up early with a purpose, it still sucks. I will never be a morning person. If you talk to me before I have a cup of coffee, I will punch you in the throat. Guaranteed.
#2 – Casual dress. My office dress code is casual. Does anyone realize how many shopping trips and money it takes to look ‘causal’ that doesn’t involve yoga pants with a hole in the crotch, a t-shirt covered in juice box stains and leopard print slippers? Um yea, a lot. Meh.
#3 - Kids will never be dressed and ready to go when you need them to be. I know it’s fun to run around the house half-naked and screaming like a banshee, but dammit people! We are now on a schedule, so get your ass dressed and lined up at the garage door STAT. Or else Mama will unleash the Kraken!
#4 – Wardrobe Schmordrorbe. Only when you perfect your hair and dress in a carefully chosen outfit for the day do your kids decide to give you a nuggie and grab you with disgustingly sticky hands. REALLY?! I am supposed to be a serious professional people, so don’t touch The Mama. Nothing says 'less-than-serious' like snot and jelly stains on your blouse when walking into the office.
#5 – I question the family diet. When I was home, I prepared healthy multi-course meals every night, ready whenever Hubby walked in the door. Now that I don’t get home until 8PM every night, I question the nutritional choices being made in my absence. Pizza and Chinese are not a part of the basic 4-food groups, despite what my beloved Hubby thinks. His idea of a meal is a cold hotdog and some chips - ugh. I worry. So much.
Where will things go from here? Eh, who knows. We’re all still trying to figure this shit out, and I’m cutting some major slack until we fall into a groove. And once we reach a really groovy-groove, I think that this certain thing will be the best thing we never knew could happen.
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