Little Woman was playing her Star Wars game on the WII the other night when she attempted to pull me away from the computer to play with her. I fell for that once. That game just confused the hell out of me. Give me an Atari joystick and a cartridge of Frogger and I would kick her ass 6 ways from Sunday. But this whole WII thing is just frustrating so I declined her invitation.
At one point, she asked me who my favorite character was from Star Wars. Well, duh, that was a no-brainer. I quickly answered Han Solo. Then she asked why.
Why? Why?! Pssshhhh, well, that’s a silly question…I had to take a moment, but eventually summed up my reasons.
#1. He was cute. A young Harrison Ford, with his rugged good looks, half-buttoned down shirt and sporting a utility belt complete with one big blaster - that was hot.
#2. He was cocky. He knew exactly how awesome he was and didn’t take shit from anyone. He considered himself more intelligent than the random slugs of the galaxy he would encounter, and ya know what? He was right.
#3. He had a great sense of humor. No matter what you threw at him, he would turn it around 10-fold, with a great big smile on his face. Sarcasm was his second language, and he wore it well. Some would consider him to be an asshole, but I saw it as sheer brilliance.
#4. He had a sweet ride. The Millennium Falcon was the most bitchin’ ship in the galaxy. Sleek, quick and oh-so-gorgeous. How could any princess deny a ride in that beauty?
#5. His best friend was a 7’3” Wookie. I mean, c’mon. The man had an exterior hard as a shell. But inside, he was a mushy smuggler that rescued this giant beauty sentenced to death. His heart was huge, and his loyalty even more so. Chewbacca would become his best friend, and vice versa. Now who the hell would not fall in love with that?!
Suddenly, I had a light-bulb moment.
Oh my god! I have been comparing every man I’ve ever dated or married to Han Solo!
Sure I was only 6 years old when the first movie ever came out, but it obviously set the bar real high. All I’ve ever wanted in a man was someone cute, intelligent, honest, edgy, loyal, confident, has a weakness for precious creatures, like animals and children, and hold me in esteemed status. A man who would respect what I bring to the table and challenge me at the same time. Someone sexy who makes me laugh and think. Sure, he may have skeletons in his closet – like a big ass bounty hunter chasing after him – but that’s ok. My skin is twice as thick, so I can handle this. If I prove my love to you, I expect the same in return. Is that really so much to ask?
Hmmmm, don’t know. Guess I better call Han and take another ride in the Falcon, see how that goes…..