How to fulfill a Quilter's fantasies

Have you ever seen the movie Exit to Eden? It's not a particularly notable film but there is one scene I will never forget. A man looking to please Rosie O'Donnell's character asks, "How can I fulfill your fantasies?" without missing a beat she replies, "Paint my house." It cracks me up every time.

After a fellow blogger, Urban Landlady, wrote a post about "romantic" lines for a landlady, I got to thinking. How would one fulfill a quilter's fantasies? Let's have some fun with this. I've got some pics of my pretend fantasy boyfriends and they will pose the question. I shall give an answer.

Let me know what I forget! I am going to start with my all time favorite leading man, Paul Newman.


I'm glad you asked, Paul. I do have one request. Can you organize my threads by color and weight?


Oh Denzel, how marvelous. Here's a seam ripper and some long arm quilting that needs to be removed. Have fun!


Why, Harrison, how nice! Could you please iron these 10 yard pieces of cottons. Use a bit of water.


Paul, I always knew you were quite a guy. Please cut out 135 squares that are 5 and 7/8". Then draw a diagonal line on each one. Use this soft pencil.


John, you are a bit young but what the heck. I can trust you to snip all the threads on the front and back of this quilt, yes?


Speaking of young, Justin, you are a new addition to my fantasy men. How about if you cut out the binding, sew it together, press it and add it to this quilt. By hand on the front, of course!

Jose Andres

José, my favorite chef, I've saved you for last. Grocery shop, cook, and then be a dear and clean everything up when we are done!


You already do! Let's go to another quilt show.

Sew happy!

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This post reminds me of the one I wrote about quilt husbands. You can click here to read it.

Filed under: humor, Quilters

Tags: quilt fantasies

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    Kathy Mathews

    My passions are quilting and sewing. Add to that French, Spanish, books, swimming, travels, new restaurants, yoga and chocolate and you have me. All of these are best shared with family and friends. Except for chocolate, don't touch my chocolate. You can email me at

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