Today's birthday? Comic actor Paul Lynde
Who made us chuckle when he grinned.
With laughter he our lives enriched
On Hollywood Squares* and in Bewitched.
A few zingers from that show:
1. Peter Marshall: What did Roy Rogers do when Trigger died?
Paul Lynde: Dismount.
2. Peter Marshall: What is a good reason for pounding meat:
Paul Lynde: Loneliness.
3. Peter Marshall: It's considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at a nudist camp. One is politics. What's the other?
Paul Lynde: tape measures.
4. Peter Marshall: According to the French Chef, Julia Child, how much is a pinch?
Paul Lynde: Just enough to turn her on.
5. Peter Marshall: In "Alice in Wonderland" who kept saying 'I'm late, I'm late"?
Paul Lynde: Alice, and her mother is sick about it.
6. Peter Marshall: If the right part comes along, will George C. Scott do a nude scene:
Paul Lynde: You mean he doesn't have the right part?
7. Peter Marshall: Diamonds should not be kept with your family jewels. Why?
Paul Lynde: They're so cold.
8. Peter Marshall: Prometheus was tied to the top of a mountain by the gods because he had given something to man. What did he give us?
Paul Lynde: I don't don't know what you got, but I got a sports shirt.
9. Peter Marshall: When you pat a dog on the head, he will usually wag his tail. What will a goose do?
Paul Lynde: Make him bark.
10. Peter Marshall: It's well known that small amounts of female hormones are found in the male body. Are male hormones ever found in the female body?
Paul Lynde: Occasionally.