Socrates, Two Apes, and Senators McCain and Graham: Reassessing the News

apes1apesSome random thoughts on current events:

1.  Republican Senators McCain and Graham aggressively  interrogated Secretary of Defense nominee Chuck Hagel yesterday.  I got the impression at times that  if they could, they would have waterboarded him.

2. A Baltimore Raven cheerleader says she was barred from the Super Bowl for being overweight. She weighs 124 pounds.  Roughly 200 pounds short of qualifying for  The Biggest Loser.

3. In a mock trial to raise funds for the National Hellenic Museum, Socrates was convicted again.  He was fined 3,000 drachmas, and his request of free meals for life was denied. He was spared being deported to Greece, though.

4. Archbishop Jose Gomez of Los Angeles characterized the behavior of his predecessor Cardinal Roger Mahony---who conspired to conceal the criminal abuse of children over his term of 26 years---"terribly sad and evil".  He says Mahony has been stripped of all administrative and public duties.  And also given 5 Hail Marys and 10 Our Fathers.

5. After President Obama urged Congress to act in a "timely fashion" on immigration reform, and said  that he would like a bill by the end of June, Majority Leader Harry Reid promptly responded by saying that the Senate would try to "legislate the way we are supposed to legislate"  by which he meant by consulting every lobby and special interest that could possibly be affected by any potential legislation.

6. $1.2 trillion in spending cuts are scheduled to happen on March 1 unless Congress kicks the sequestration down the road.  It's the  political version of  "March Madness". Republican Senator Lindsey Graham calls the sequester cuts to the bloated Pentagon "pretty dumb...this to me wins the prize".  He's totally OK , though,with all spending cuts to social programs.  Which might prompt those 47 percenters to take turns kicking  his cold-hearted ass down the road.

7. An orangutan and a gibbon at Brookfield Zoo have become good friends. It's rare for two different species of apes to do so. There's hope for Congress, yet.

8. Cubs closer Carlos Marmol has been accused of assaulting and kidnapping a woman in his native Dominican Republic. He "totally denies it." It's not clear at this point whether his accuser bears any  resemblance to Kyra Sedgwick, star of "The Closer".  Theo Epstein says he's sifting through a mound of evidence.

Filed under: humor, politics, Pop Culture


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  • Good, let em' stick it to Socrates all they can. Father of dialectic. If it weren't for him this country wouldn't be a 'lawyer state'.

  • In reply to 4zen:

    It's a stretch to blame Socrates for a legal culture of pettifogging lawyers. That was the line of the Sophists of his time who were his enemies and had a lot to do with his downfall.

  • In reply to Aquinas wired:

    Not totally out of bounds. It was said that the case study method was either Karl Llewellyn or Socratic.

  • One of the best books I ever read was Robert Pirsig's 'zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance'. He sided with the sophists. He blamed Socrates and Plato for placing truth above value or quality, and Nietzsche agrees with him, though Nietzsche did like the old man's will to power.

    Socrates would take any side of the same argument, he didn't care. Same with a lawyer. My neighbor is a DUI lawyer. He told he always hopes for more playoff games in the city, not 'cause he's a fan, but because all the DUI's generated.

  • 1. After pussyfooting with fellow Senator Kerry, I guess a couple of them had to get tough on Hagel. Surprisingly, I was so unable to find something of interest on over the air TV that I landed on the Korean channel (41), which was covering the Hagel hearings. The anchor woman (quite cute looking) was introducing the clips with "Hagel said ___ about North Korea," but the clips themselves were "Iran, Al Queda, Islamic terrorists ... and that also goes for North Korea." One of Hagel's responses was that "unlike Iran, North Korea is not a nuclear threat, it is an actuality," so maybe I'll give the Korean anchor a pass on that.

    2. She looked fat in the picture. However, I guess it was compared to the average cheerleader who is 5'9", 105 lbs., and most of it in the breasts.

    3. I saw the TV report on that, indicating that the prosecutors were Fitzgerald and Collins vs. Dan Webb and Bob Clifford, and Webb again lost. Hope Webb was doing it pro bono like he claims he'll do the Koschman case, and I guess Clifford didn't get his traditional 33% of the hemlock. And, as for deporting him to Greece, the could have done worse and deported him to Greece, N.Y.

    4. Not to piss of 4zen again, I'll pass on this, other than thinking that they thought that the Hail Marys and Our Fathers were sufficient.

    8. I guess it was Starlin Castro that was accused (but not charged) with assault the last time.

  • Jack, Mahony makes Paterno look like Mrs. Doubtfire...but this fact will not make me into a cheerleader for nihilism, or for the hubris of secular humanism. Amen.

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