To Valentine's Day - love and sex and the whole damn thing

Today is Valentine's Day, my babies! (Although any love holiday that can be abbreviated by "V.D." might want to consider a reboot. But I digress.)


Careful watchers of this space may recall that your scribe ain't exactly Happy Lucky Girl in matters of the heart. I've loved, married, lost and danced with the unrequited (which is far worse than losing, IMHO). At this point in my soul-mammal quest, I'm pretty much the cynic's cynic.  Alas, in every cynic's heart lies a wounded romantic; who knows one day what Cruel Fate may bring? I only hope that he is smart, funny, handsome, a chiropractor and well-endowed (and by well-endowed, I don't mean by the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation).  British a plus. (Hey - you hope your way, I'll hope mine.)

If it's all you want, sex is easy.  Just ask ten people if they'd like to shag. You'll get lucky at least once. Just wrap that rascal and go!

Love is the rub, fair reader.  (It's also the drug, if you can believe Bryan Ferry.  Who resembles kd lang, BTW.  Will these digressions ever cease?)

Here are my favorite quotes on love and marriage:

"By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher"
Socrates (470/469 – 399 BC)

“Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience”
Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

"Love: a temporary insanity curable by marriage"
Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914) 

“Longed for him. Got him. Shit”
Margaret Atwood (1939-)

“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages”
German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900) also had more details advice for people about to get married, saying: "When marrying, ask yourself this question: 'Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this person into your old age?' Everything else in marriage is transitory.”

And my favorite, BY my favorite:

"God created sex. Priests created marriage"

French philosopher Voltaire (1694-1778), who also said: "Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly."

It's easy to be jaded on Valentine's Day, but I did so enjoy it when I was a lass.  The conversation hearts. The paper lunch sack taped to the front of your desk to hold the valentines from your classmates. The Fanny May foil-wrapped chocolate hearts.  The one time a secret admirer sent a single red carnation to my door.

Lovely, faded memories.

If you are happily in love this Valentine's Day, bully for you and sincerely. Don't know how the hell you do it, but you are fortunate; trust me. The dating pool is shallow; lots of quiet desperation out there in Single Land, my babies.


Perhaps one day, I'll no longer be counted amongst the desperados.


Here's last year's piece on Valentine's Day, wherein I wax Bard-like!  It's actually pretty good!


THAT'S RIGHT…. come closer…. closerrrr…...

Thank you for reading, luv - now come orbit Planet Michelle! Just type in your e-mail address, over to the right and up, and you'll receive each post I pull from my little monkey brain.  No spam or name-selling, ever.  My magnetic field awaits you!

Also, like me on Facebook if you're so-inclined!  It's over there, to the right & up.  OOO - yes - that's it - right there!  

Old school, are ye?  Well, then e-mail me - I dig those, too: 

Filed under: humor, Love

Tags: love, sex, Soul mate, Valentine's Day


Leave a comment
  • What a hoot!

Leave a comment