Summer Days: Why I may never work from home again

The thought of summer vacation can bring your child nothing but feelings of happiness and excitement.  For what lies ahead is nothing but 3 consecutive months of endless BBQs, gatherings by the pool, trips to the beach, block parties, and of course, family vacations.  As a parent or caregiver, whether you stay at home, work full-time, part-time, whatever, summer vacation usually means that it’s your responsibility to find something for your children to do all day, every day for those 3 consecutive months.

ALL DAY, EVERY DAY for 3 months.

The hubby and I both work full-time, so summer vacation to us means having to find a place for our kids to go that isn’t too far, isn’t going to break the bank and isn’t going to have them sitting on their asses all day.  We usually get two out three so we try not to complain about the cost too much, but damn, summer camp is one expensive whore.  To help save us a little bit of money the hubby and I came up with a solution:

I would work from home one day a week while the hubby would take a vacation day one day a week.

It was a win win for us.  We would be able to spend more time with the kids and not have to dish out a small fortune for their “Adventure” camp.  It was perfect.

Today is my last day working from home as my kids go back to school on Tuesday, and let me just say, after working from home for the past 3 months, I MAY NEVER WANT TO WORK FROM HOME AGAIN!

Here’s why:

We were stuck indoors all day until 5pm

Unless I found a place that had a wifi signal, we were in the house.  Quite frankly it takes me too damn long to get the kids ready to go somewhere else and by the time we did get to a place that offers wifi, half the day was already gone.  I can’t really move from my computer as I’m watching both my email as well as my boss’, so if the kids want some fresh air, they had to resort to the backyard while I watched from the window.  Oh, and shit on me if it was raining.  All hell broke loose then.

I could never get anything done

As much work as I had to get done some days, it was almost nearly impossible to actually concentrate on the task at hand while having to take breaks to make breakfast, lunch, and start on dinner.  Not to mention breaking up numerous arguments between the kids, washing dishes 8 times a day and trying my damnedest to keep the house looking at least halfway decent.  Oh, and don’t get me started on trying to take conference calls from home.  I’ve had to resort to dialing in from my basement sitting next to the cat litter.  The bathroom had too much of an echo.

My car was towed, TWICE!

This was mainly our fault for forgetting, but if I would’ve been at work, the car wouldn’t have been parked in front on street cleaning day, and hence, we’d be $500 richer.  Not really because we would’ve spent it on dumb shit like happy meals and Disney store purchases but you get what I’m saying.

My internet access would fail.  ALL THE TIME!

Try being on three different web windows while on the phone with a travel agent while having to make a glass of strawberry milk and then having your screen freeze up.  This happened every single time I was working from home, I shit you not.  After this happened, my VPN access wouldn’t work for the rest of the day.  I had to go through the rest of the day working on webmail.  Remember early on when I mentioned I had to monitor 2 inboxes?  Try doing that on webmail.  Logging out of my email to log back in to my boss’ email then logging out again from his email just to log back in to my email was my entire day.  Ahhhhhhhhh! should be a real word in the dictionary, exclamation point and all.

I was in a shitty mood all day (meaning my kids hated my f*cking guts all day)

I don’t like being in a shitty mood.  It gives me wrinkles, not to mention a bitch of a headache.  Unfortunately I’m put into one based on certain occurrences that happen throughout my day.  Let’s just say that the certain occurrences recently disclosed almost always put me in a shitty mood no matter how much I tried get around it.  Me being in a shitty mood doesn’t sit well with me or my kids, so it sucked all the way around.  They pretty much hated me the entire day while I tried to get my work done.  I’ve been called mean, I’ve already heard the words “I hate you” from Miss J, which to be honest I wasn’t expecting until she was at least 14, and The Beast made the frowny face at me one too many times.

They called me mean... :-(

I was ignoring my children.

I can’t tell you how many times I held up my index finger to my babies while on a work related phone call.  I don’t know how many times I was typing something up and one of the kids approached me to tell me something just to have me ask them to give me a minute, which usually turned into ten.  By the time I was done, they had already walked away.  I don’t even want to think about how much TV they watched so I can have at least 20 minutes of quiet work time.  Geez, even the cats were shunned out.  “You pussies are gonna have to wait” was a phrase I commonly utilized when they expected a petting.

The hubby had it easy.  He’d call me on his day off from the park or send me video’s of Devo learning how to skateboard.  Lucky bastard.

Not all days were bad I must admit.  I did enjoy getting up at 8am instead of 5:45am and my kids were sometimes interested in what I was working on.  I must say that they did get very uninterested very quickly though.

I did, however, appreciate that my boss gave me the opportunity to work from home; even though a percentage of the work I submitted to him either needed to be resubmitted for errors I had made or someone else had to get my work done due to me not physically being in the office.  Regardless, it really did help us out, so thank you, Sam.  Just know that if I ever call in or email you to ask if I could work from home in the future, it’s for a damn good reason.

I guess no matter how much I’m going to miss the summer days of endless BBQs, gatherings by the pool, trips to the beach, block parties, and of course family vacations, I’m glad they’re going back to school.  I’m sure they’re just as happy.  I’m just crossing my fingers that on first day of class when their teachers ask them what they did during summer break they won’t mention their mean mother and her stupid asshole of a laptop.


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