Grief is an evil monster. During my years as an organizer I have worked with many people who are going through a hard time. Whether it's a death in the family, divorce, or loss of job- it hurts. It feels like the world is crashing down. Who wants to do laundry or take out the trash; when all you really want to do is stare at the wall.
Last year, I had a double whammy. My wonderful Grandmother passed away. She was 99 so it wasn't totally unexpected but it still hurt. She was my mentor is so many ways. It was a very emotional time at her funeral due to some disconnects with the family.
I made it through the day and was happy to head back to Chicago when I got a text. One of my best friends from childhood was in the hospital with organ failure. I literally froze. Ironically there was a plane heading to Austin three gates away. If I could have moved, I would have ran to it and begged to board.
I felt my legs buckle. As I stood in line to board my plane, I almost fainted. Somehow, I gathered enough strength to get on the plane. I must have looked pretty bad because the flight attendant asked me what was wrong. I told her I just came from a funeral. I think I scared her.
When the phone rang two days later at 7 am, I almost didn't answer the call. I knew. It was another one of our friends telling me that Neph has passed. Like a robot, I got in the shower and went to work. As I was organizing a closet, I started writing her eulogy in my mind. When I got home that afternoon, I wrote it down.
I spent the next two months in shock. My normally high energy level took quite a dip. I didn't have the desire to do much. I knew this was a temporary state of mind(and normal).
I still had to function. I had a business to run, cats to feed, and a life to live. I just needed to take a step back for a little while. Here are some things I did to help me make it through my "double whammy".
- I stopped all my extra projects. As you know, I love my DIY stuff.
- I wrote a list of things I needed to do each day and stuck to it.
- I kept myself on a schedule.
- I slowed down socially until I felt I could go out with a smile on my face.
- Gave myself a lot of downtime and didn't feel guilty about it.
- I didn't write for several months.
Giving myself permission to slow down and simplify my life was the best things I did for myself!! Remember grieving is a normal and natural state. Take care of yourself.