Bad news Bulls fans. Boozer isn't going anywhere.
Just the other day word came out the Bulls were looking at sending Boozer (and C.J. Watson) to Lakers for Pau Gasol. That trade’s not happening. There is no way in hell the Lakers are trading for a shorter, slower, less skilled power forward that has a longer contract. It’d be as dumb as trading Lamar Odom away for two pizzas and some Gatorade (...Nevermind. Maybe they'd be dumb enough to make the deal). I just can’t imagine the Lakers making such a foolish trade for Boozer. Why? Because they’ve got eyes. They’re watching the same games and the same awful play that has Chicagoans up in arms.
The other dream scenario for Bulls fans is the insertion of Boozer into a deal for Howard. I can just see Otis Smith's office on the trade deadline now: "Yeah guys, I just think we're best off taking our chances and keeping Dwight. I mean, who in their right mind would walk away from $30 Million.... Wait, nevermind. Just got a text from Chicago. They're offering Boozer! Just what we wanted!!! Bye Bye Dwight."
So no. Boozer isn't being traded anytime soon. You know the reasons, even if you've been ignoring them. He's undersized, overpaid, and the dude paints his hair. (FWIW: I joked about Boozer painting his hair several weeks before he actually did in an old post. Might be the lamest thing someone's ever taken pride in... well other than Andray Baltche and his Trip-Dub.)
Now I'm going to list a few trades that might actually be possible (Possible in that these other teams would actually be willing, not that the Bulls would ever consider such awful trades).
Boozer to the Bobcats for Diaw and Henderson.
This deal kinda sucks for the Bulls but, hey, beggars can't be choosers. A few bright spots would be the money saved by dumping Boozer onto Charlotte. Diaw's contract would expire at the end of the season and the Bulls would be in a spot where they could look to start over and find a PF that they actually like. As far as Henderson, he's a tall, lanky, guard that could find a spot in the rotation.
And for the Bobcats. Well, this makes them better. It really does. That's just how bad they are. They bring in a possible fan favorite (I don't really think he will be, but he went to Duke and that's close enough. Besides, there are only so many regions left in America that don't hate Boozer.)
Boozer to Toronto for Barbosa and Davis.
Okay, this trade doesn't help the Bulls all that much (duh). But Barbosa's contract is expiring and he could be a decent 2 guard to replace Rip who's legs are expected to spontaneously combust come April. And Ed Davis is, well, Ed Davis. He's not completely awful. Which is my way of sugar coating it.
If we're being real. I gotta think that Boozer would actually flourish pretty well playing with Calderon who would run the Pick and Roll somewhat more efficiently than Rose (I don't mean that he's better than Rose at running it, just that he's a much more willing passer who would look for Boozer often... because the rest of his teammates are still Raptors).
Those are all the trades for now, but don't worry. Once we draw closer to the trade deadline we'll bust out ESPN's Trade Machine some more and come up with some awful trades for da Bulls.
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