Creating a bucket list sounds like a great idea; unfortunately, we tend to begin writing it only when we realize we are not going to live forever. I started my list when I was 46 years old. While I have checked a few things off of it, my list will never be realized not only because I keep adding more and more items to it; but because I am physically unable to accomplish some of my goals.
I looked at my list the other day and I started getting heart palpitations---so many things to do, so little time. I thought I was going to have a heart attack which, I can tell you, was definitely not on my list. Isn't the list supposed to make us feel better; after all it is meant to help us achieve the things we deem important before we die. Instead, all I saw were the numerous things I will never be able to do. For instance, I always wanted to experience the endorphin rush everyone talks about from exercising hard. I have tried many times but my body has other ideas. Wearing a morphine patch while walking around the block to get my endorphin high is wrong on so many levels, right?
I decided I could not take the stress of my bucket list anymore. I took my list of angst to the garbage and as I was crunching the paper into a ball it hit me. I don’t need a bucket list; what I really need is a f**k it list.
Here are some entries on my new list:
- I will exercise, but I refuse to kill myself by having unrealistic goals
- I will eat healthy, but if I feel like eating poorly one day, I will not beat myself up
- I will continue to help others, but I will not sacrifice my own needs
- I am happy to give my profession 110%, but I will not allow my profession to take 110% from me
I would love to share more with you but alas I am tired so f**k it!
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