The Oprah interview with Lindsay Lohan: The rehab recap

The Oprah interview with Lindsay Lohan: The rehab recap
It's a new pensive, spiritual Lindsay.

Did you know that one of the recovery steps they teach at Betty Ford is to do an interview with Oprah?  It’s true, she can really help cement the recovery process in place- with Lindsay Lohan anyway.  Just four days after completing her sixth stint in rehab, Lindsay sat down with Oprah for a serious chat.

Now, I’m not an addict, but I’ve watched a lot of “Intervention.”  The first 55 minutes of the show detail the hell that is someone’s addiction.  During the last five minutes of the show, one of three things happens: 1) we find out the person did not complete rehab; 2) we find out that they completed rehab, but they relapsed shortly thereafter; or 3) we learn that they completed rehab and have stayed sober.  I cry at the end of every episode.  I cry from happiness if the person stayed sober, and I cry from disappointment if they didn’t (note: I do not know the people on “Intervention”, I’m just a natural crier).

The thing about Lindsay is that four days out we can’t really tell where she is in her recovery process.  We need to see the Oprah interview a couple months out to see if she is really going to stay sober this time.  She says all the right things and she sounds sincere, but she is literally four days out of her three month journey, so time will tell.  I’m guarded, but in the words of our beloved O, “I want you to win.”

So what juicy nuggets did Oprah pry from our little starlet?  Thankfully, the interview followed a clear outline, which allows a recap to practically write itself.  Please assume that throughout all of this Lindsay repeatedly proclaimed how she is really in a good place and is ready to live a healthy life (I’m not being trite; that was really the theme throughout, but you’ll get bored if I keep writing about it).  Here we go.

Rehab: There have been six stints in rehab since 2007.  The first was the result of an Ambien “scare” as she did not realize the potency of its side effects, and several other rehab stays were the result of DUIs (one of which was accompanied by two weeks in jail).  She claimed that during those early stays she subconsciously wanted to go to rehab to “find some peace” in her life.  She said that she was young (21) and having fun, and she didn’t take rehab seriously.  Most recently, Lindsay said that she consulted with her attorney and they decided together that her best option was to go to rehab to really focus on herself.  She believed that because she went willingly and really “surrendered to the process” the results will be different this time.  What did she learn?  That she doesn’t need to turn to outside substances to feel anything.

Drugs: Oprah wasn’t messing around.  Straight up, she wanted to know if Lindsay is an addict, to which she answered affirmatively.  She said her “drug of choice” was alcohol as a “gateway” to other drugs.  She said she has only used cocaine 10 – 15 times (and snorted it in case you were wondering- Oprah was, apparently) and used it so that she could drink more.  Since Oprah is a quasi-therapist, she pressed Lindsay to disclose what alcohol was being used to cover up.  Lindsay was a bit cagey on this point and vaguely mentioned growing up in a chaotic home, concluding that she may have an addiction to chaos itself, adding that rehab has helped her learn to “be comfortable with things being okay.”  Rightfully, Oprah wanted to know what will be different about her rehab outcome this time (which she asked repeatedly throughout the interview, come to think of it), and Lindsay said that not taking Adderall (a prescription ADHD medication) will be key.  She claims to only take vitamins now.  Oh, and her medicine for acid reflux (Stars, they’re just like us: they burp and have indigestion!).

Downward Spiral: Oprah reminisced about what an adorable ‘tween Lindsay was in “The Parent Trap” (I concur- she was precious), and reminded her of subsequent cinematic successes, ultimately earning $7 million per movie.  What in the world happened, Lindsay?!?!  Well, she moved to Los Angeles on her own at 18, against the wishes of her family.  She spent crazy amounts of money (with no one really telling her not to), and she was surrounded by people who may not have had her best interests at heart, so things spun out of control.  Over a period of time she realized that she had a problem and was wasting her talent.  She believes she must have had some guardian angels to keep anything seriously horrific from happening during all the craziness.

Family: I have to hand it to Lindsay: Oprah tried her damnedest to get her to talk smack about her parents, and she wouldn’t do it.  The most she would say is that there are certain things she wished had been kept private, but she quickly noted that all that is in the past and suggested that it wouldn’t be productive to dwell on it.  What about the call last year that Lindsay made to her dad alleging that her mom was using cocaine?  Lindsay took the blame for that, saying SHE had been out partying and then got into it with her mom, and during a moment of sleep deprivation phoned her dad and falsely accused her mom of using cocaine.  Fair enough, said Oprah, but why would her father make that call public?  Lindsay speculated that it had more to do with issues between her parents than an attempt by her dad to embarrass her (although she claimed they were all having lunch this week, so some reconciliation must have occurred).  Oprah was clearly seeing the salaciousness of this particular story slipping away, so she tried to incite Lindsay by asking her if she felt she was exploited by her mother as is the common perception.  No, an at-peace Lindsay avowed.   Finally, a last ditch effort by O: did Lindsay feel that her parents sold her out?  She stayed strong but did concede that her father may have disclosed some things that he shouldn’t have during a period of estrangement.  Practically begging, Oprah tried to get Lindsay to agree to some toxicity in her relationship with her parents, but Lindsay maintained that no one else can be blamed for her mistakes.  *sigh*

Wrap-Up: Post commercial break, Oprah claimed to be anxious to see Lindsay’s sober life actualized in the future.  Oprah noted that Lindsay is scheduled to go to Europe for a “yoga and meditation retreat” with her brother, and Oprah was concerned about this plan so soon after rehab.  Rather than end the show with a hug and tears, Oprah imparted a motherly warning to Lindsay, asking her to promise to think about whether this trip to Europe is such a good idea.  A clearly uncomfortable Lindsay agreed to think about it, probably because Oprah won’t release her from the interview until she did.  In a very dramatic turn, we learned following the conclusion of the interview that two days later Lindsay cancelled her trip to Europe.

Chalk up another victory for O!

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