I'm not smart enough to watch the new Kanye West video

I'm not smart enough to watch the new Kanye West video

Last night Kanye West released the official video for "BLKKK SKKKN HEAD".  The video, which you are ONLY supposed to watch from his website, was leaked a couple weeks ago.  Here are his (truly heartbreaking) Tweets (@kanyewest) about the video and the leak, just for some context:

7/9/13:  The BLKKK SKKKN HD video that leaked yesterday was not the official version.

7/9/13:  Me and Nick Knight have been working on this video for 5 months and for creatives it's heartbreaking when something like this happens.

7/9/13:  The final version will be ready within the next week.

7/9/13:  So any website that may have the unapproved / unfinished ruff. I ask you to please take it down.

7/9/13:  Allow me and Nick to give the world what we've been losing sleep over.

7/9/13:  And to who ever leaked the video... FUK YOU!

7/10/13:  gq.com/entertainment/...

7/20/13:  I open the debate... The 2nd verse of New Slaves is the best rap verse of all time...meaning...OF ALL TIME IN THE HISTORY OF RAP MUSIC, PERIOD

7/21/13:  BLKKK SKKKN HEAD INFO pic.twitter.com/ROYekqB2aR (boring info about the video)

7/22/13:  BLKKK SKKKN HEAD kanyewest.com

7/22/13:  If you put a link to my site people will be able to chop & screw the video. this is a step toward the possibilities of internet based video

7/22/13:  please don't diminish the user experience by just posting it as a normal video ... please link them to my site

While it's very tempting to editorialize about his Tweets, I'll stick with the subject at hand: I'm apparently not hip enough to understand how to watch the video.  What the heck does "chopped and screwed" mean?  Is it the same thing as "point and click"?  I'm pointing clicking and nothing is happening except that the video pauses when I do that, which I don't think is that exciting.  To Google I went, which directed me to this Urban Dictionary definition of "chopped and screwed":

Slowing down a song to a furneral pace and repeating certain points of the songs to create a double-up effect. Chopped and Screwed music originated in the early 1990's from legendary DJ Screw, the godfather of Screwed Music, who perfected the art of slowing down one record on one turntable and then having the same record on another turntable at a delay so as create a repetition. DJ Screw had his own label, Screwed Up Records, and own group, Screwed Up Click. DJ Screw suddenly passed away in November 2000 from heart failure which was attributed to drinking prescription cough syrup. This cough "syrup" was popularized in in late 2000 by Three 6 Mafia with "Sippin on Some Syrup". The syrup claimed to help become infused in the Chopped and Screwed music. They syrup slowed down motor skills and was directed related to Chopped and Screwed music.

Okay, still a little confused about how to watch the dumb video since I didn't think it was that great the first time- I must still be missing something since Urban Dictionary didn't exactly provide me with a step-by-step.  From what I saw, it's just Kanye showing off his ripped bod, which is a slap in the face to his baby mama, still trying to get her fab curves back.  Anyway, further Googling led me to learn that the viewer is supposed to be able to control playback speed or take screenshots with the help of a cursor flipping the viewer off.  My computer didn't do that (just looking like a regular boring arrow), and my phone certainly didn't do that.

So my conclusion is that I'm either still not smart enough to watch Kanye's video and appreciate the genius of it, or my computer/phone isn't.  Try for yourself, and please feel free to leave any hints in the comments.

Since Kanye insists that you watch it ONLY from his website, I cannot post the video here but must direct you here.  Enjoy (I guess).

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