Archive for April 2014

Mental Health Month and Pubic Hair

May is Mental Health Month and so, as often as possible during the very, merry month of May, I will be sharing information about all things mental health! I will be sharing my own writing, the writing of others, links, organizations, ideas, photos, gifs, memes, stories, resources and oh my gawd so much more. You... Read more »

Opossums are assholes

I haven’t slept well all week. I tend to be a bit temperamental even when I do get a good night’s sleep, so you can just imagine what I’m like when I’m sleep deprived. I’m fucking cuckoo. This is why I haven’t been sleeping. His name is Brody and he’s been a bit out of... Read more »

Lunch: A Love Story

Meal preparation is my least favorite mom chore. Especially dinner, because fuck that shit, you know? When I say, “Fuck you, Dinner,” it isn’t just shtick. That’s seriously my mantra and life motto. By dinnertime, I’m tired and my ADHD meds are completely out of my system. I can’t take more stimulant medication, or I’ll... Read more »
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Yo, Amanda - Call me back!

Dear Amanda, I am so bummed that I missed your call, I was watching South Park with my fourteen year old and I didn’t hear the phone ring! I don’t know who the fuck Amy, James, Peggy, Brent, Michael, Catherine and David are, but my name is Nikki, and I could really use some of... Read more »

How to tie a f*cking tie

My son has his eighth grade spring formal today so I bought him a spiffy new outfit, sans the necktie, since my husband has a gazillion for him to choose from. I sent my son into the shit-hole that is his dad’s closet to pick one out, because I’m too afraid to even open the... Read more »

The sad and salty story of Puff Dummy (why you should never stop listening to your mother)

The other day, I was all set to write something about the Listen to your Mother Chicago show when I heard this little voice from downstairs saying, “Nikki – I’m so cold! So cold! Come warm me up in the microwave and put me in your bellay!” As I walked down the stairs, I heard... Read more »
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Thank you, Ativan, for helping me bleeding out a book...again!

People have been asking the same three questions lately. 1) Why don’t you post as much on Facebook? 2) When book number two is coming out? 3) Can I have some of your Ativan? First of all, about Facebook, well, when I have something to say, I say it. I just have less to say... Read more »

Parenting 101: Mind your own business (and then blog about it later)

Do you typically mind your own business? When you are presented with an opportunity to give unsolicited advice or information about raising kids to other parents, do you resist? Something we should all learn in Parenting 101 is to mind our own fucking business. Is it hard for you? Me too. If it’s hard for... Read more »

Alcoholics Anonymous: One size does not fit all

One size does not fit all. This is a bold and truthful expression whether it’s being used in the literal or metaphorical sense. I love a good metaphor and if I can find one to help me deliver the blog goods about whatever it is I’m blogging about; I’ll beat that metaphor into the ground.... Read more »
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Why you should pull April Fools Day pranks on your kids

Are you wondering if you should April Fools prank your crumb snatchers today? Are you worried that you will damage their fragile psyches? Do it and don’t worry about it! There are way worse things you can do to screw up kids and you will probably do a lot of them by mistake, so why... Read more »